Crossroads
by DaynaWayna
Summary: STORY 2. On Assignment in 1997, the Voyagers struggle with Princess Diana's death. They take a break in Texas where Tracy is on Assignment. Jeff chooses a dark path to deal with his depression, which could have devasting results for more than just Jeff.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_Saturday, September 6, 1997_

Jeff was staring off out over the ocean when Bogg finally found him. He had been crying almost non-stop since the Princess' funeral and showed little sign of stopping anytime soon.

"There had to be another way, Bogg!" he shouted as his friend approached. "This shouldn't have happened! We could have stopped her..." This was the first time their new Omni sent them On Assignment outside of the set boundary of 1982, and the first time Jeff had Omnied into what should have been his future. As the tears slowed, Jeff's anger surfaced anew, having brought up the memories of his parents death. It also didn't help that he was now 14 years old and trying desperately to be more in control of his emotions.

The frightened child and the angry young adult converged and let Phineas have it with both barrels. "I thought we were supposed to protect people Bogg, not let them die! She was a mother, she was beautiful... She was just beginning to be happy again and now this! Why didn't you go with them? Why did you let Henri drive the car? Or why didn't you and Dodi's chauffeur divert the reporters' attention? Do you know how hard it was to look William in the face, knowing I could have prevented his mother's death? Do you? No, you don't! You can't possibly know how it feels because you've never lost your parents!"

Bogg winced at the razor-sharp words as Jeff ranted on. "Why'd that stupid Omni of yours bring us here, anyway? Didn't HQ set it so we wouldn't get any assignments past 1982 because we didn't want a guidebook? I know nothing about 1997 without a guidebook! Now, 1982 or before, piece of cake! Jeeze Bogg, I'm supposed to be 27 years old in 1997! If I'd have known this history, I would have..."

"Done exactly what we did," Bogg finished. Jeff glared at him as he continued. "That's why we have the Omni—to make sure things are right even if we think they aren't. History is history, whether we like the outcome or not. You know we can't change it to suit our needs. And how do you think I felt when I got the news of their death...knowing I had to let Diana and Dodi go off that night without me? I was their bodyguard for God's sake! I headed to the car and the Omni went red, so I told Trevor to go ahead without me and WHAM: Green light. And then they were chased by the press and crashed... how do you think I felt?" _'Like hell'_, he thought. '_But what could I have done to save them… or myself? My God, **I** could have died...'_

This was not the first time that thought had occurred to him; in fact it haunted him daily. But at this moment, with Jeff's grief so close, it had never been more real… or terrifying. He took a deep breath to calm himself before continuing, "Look, I know as much about 1997 as you do kid. And we went over this back in July when we got here: The only reason I can still see for us ending up here is that The Council needed us to be here. Given the circumstances do you really think anyone else could have helped the Princes the way you have?"

Jeff shook his head. He'd been with Harry and William when Charles came and told them the news of their mother's death. "I guess my experience was worth something if it means I helped them through this," Jeff said forlornly. "When my parents died, no one really understood how I felt. Like Harry and William, I was angry, confused, hurt, depressed..."

"And another thing," Phineas continued, "I didn't let anything happen. I got a red light so I stayed behind. Do you think I've enjoyed this anymore than you have?"

He knelt down beside Jeff, put both hands on his shoulders and looked him square in the eyes. "I know this hurts. Believe me, I know. I wish it didn't have to be this way, Jeff, but we are Voyagers and we need to keep history the way it's supposed to be. We don't have to understand it, just accept it. As much as it sickens me to say it kid, she had to die."

Jeff was quiet for a moment as he took it all in, then heaved a heavy sigh, "Let's get out of here, Bogg. I need to be far away from this place. I don't want to remember..."

"You got it, kid." Bogg interrupted him mid-sentence. "And I know just the place." Jeff looked at him quizzically, but Bogg only smiled. "Trust me, you'll love it! It'll be just the place for us to unwind and relax." He set the Omni coordinates two weeks from the current date, entered the destination and pressed the button.

A moment later, they landed at the front gate of a ranch. As they got up and dusted themselves off, Jeff looked around to get his bearings. Bogg walked through the gate and headed toward the house with Jeff close behind him.

"Bogg? Where are we?"

"Texas. September 20th, 1997. Green Light."

Jeff looked at the ranch house and then he knew: They were at Tracy's ranch! Tracy was a classmate of Phineas' who had ended up helping Jeff save Bogg from a renegade Voyager who was bent on destroying Real History for her own pleasure.

She was now on assignment in Texas since May of 1996, and had been there for over a standard Linear Year helping the Boyd family keep their ranch in the family. As part of the assignment, she had ended up buying the ranch and was now in the process of transferring ownership back to the brothers, Kirk and Matt. She and Bogg had become rather close when they 'saved the world' and so the Voyager Council had made sure that Bogg's new Omni would send them to Tracy's assignment, since they would stop by from time to time between their own assignments.

"I can't wait to see the puppies again," Jeff said excitedly. He and Simon Boyd, Kirk's son, had found 2 newborn pups abandoned by the river the first time he and Bogg had been to the Ranch.

"For the last time Jeffrey: they're not puppies anymore! They were nine months old when we were here in April 1997 and they weren't little then!"

Just then he saw two large Golden Retrievers running towards them. "Bogg, look! They're HUGE!"

As she finished cooking supper, Tracy heard the dogs start to bark excitedly and then take off running down the road to the main gate. She went to the window and her heart leaped for joy.

"Jeff and Phineas are back!" She cried. "Matt set two more spots at the table for dinner!" When she got to them, Katie was jumping all over Phineas and had knocked him to the ground. Bo had attacked Jeff with the same reckless abandon and both dogs were showering them with big wet kisses. Tracy stood there laughing at the sight.

"Enough, girl!" Bogg said through the onslaught of love. "Katie, sit!" She immediately sat, still on top of him, and continued to lick him. Phineas shielded his face and hollered, to no avail. He finally gave Katie a shove and said, "Sit!" Again, Katie sat, looking at him as if to say, "Didn't I do that before?"

"Good girl!" Bogg said as he rubbed her head.

Having learned from Bogg's mistake, Jeff pushed Bo off of him before giving him the same command and said with a smile, "I didn't think you could ever get a girl to listen to you Bogg!"

"She's just gotta be the right girl," he said.

"Don't I listen well?" Tracy asked as she came up and gave him a big hug.

Phineas returned the hug with a grin. "Only when you want to, my dear," he said, and gave her a kiss.

Seeing Bogg and Tracy together again made Jeff smile. 'One big, happy family' ...The train of thought took off before he could stop it: His parent's mangled car, their funeral, Diana's car, William and Harry, Diana's funeral...

Bo sensed a change in his boy and whimpered. Tracy turned and saw the look on Jeff's face. "Jeff? Jeff, honey, what's wrong?" Bogg opened his mouth to tell her but was cut off by Jeff's headlong dash into Tracy's arms. Bo was next to him in an instant and Katie looked up at Bogg and whined.

"It's OK, girl," he said sadly as he rubbed her head, "we've just had a rough week." She pushed her muzzle into his hand and licked it as if to say, 'it'll be ok'.

Tracy looked over Jeff's head to Bogg and mouthed the words, "What happened?"

He shook his head as they went into the house. "It's a long story," he said, his voice husky with emotion.

Once inside, Tracy sent them into the front room and went back to the dining room where the Boyds and the ranch hands were gathering for dinner. "Save us a plate of something, guys. I don't know what happened, but Phineas and Jeff need me right now."

"Yes, ma'am," Matt said. "You go take care of them, and we'll be just fine in here."

"Jeff's here? Is he OK?" Simon was on his feet and moving to the front room to see his friend when his dad stopped him.

"Later son. Let Miss Tracy spend some time with them right now." Simon started to respond but Kirk stood firm, "No, I mean it. Sit down, and if he needs you, Miss Tracy will let you know. Just give them some space for now."

Back in the front room, Phineas filled Tracy in on their assignment, and gave her all the details of the past few weeks. The whole world had been rocked by the senseless loss, and Tracy had secretly thought of using her Omni to go back and 'make things right' if she didn't already have a red light on her current assignment. Like Jeff, who was holding on to her like a security blanket, she had a hard time believing Diana was supposed to die. She rubbed his shoulder absently as she took it all in.

"Are you sure you had a green light to stay behind? Couldn't it have been..." she trailed off, seeing the painful answer in his eyes. She knew that Phineas Bogg would not make that kind of mistake. Her heart broke for the both of them, especially Jeff.

Now that he was here, Jeff felt safe. The entire ordeal had left him feeling like a rag doll, and as he listened to the adults talk, he fell into an exhausted sleep in Tracy's arms. Bogg carried him into the guestroom and laid him down on the bed. Tracy covered him and kissed his cheek, "My poor boy," she whispered, and crept out of the room.

Back in the front room Phineas collapsed on the couch, the stress of the past week clearly etched on his face. Tracy curled up next to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Phineas, you don't have to be strong anymore. Jeff's asleep and we are alone. The others have eaten and have explicit instructions not to bother us." Bogg just stared at the fireplace. Tracy looked deeply into his blue eyes, seeing only pain. She tried again.

"Please Phineas. Please talk to me."

He didn't respond, and she let it rest. 'Sometimes', she thought, 'just being with someone is enough'. After 10 minutes of sitting in silence, she looked up to see if he was even still awake. His eyes were filled with tears.

"It's OK," she whispered. "Let it go." Those three simple words were like a sledgehammer hitting a wall, releasing all the emotion he'd held inside for a week.

He had cried with Jeff and the young princes, but even then he'd had to be strong. This wound was different, deeper. Having gone outside of Jeff's realm of expertise without a guidebook, they consequently came to a point in time where their voyage was to insure a green light by someone's death. What made it so difficult was that they had gotten to know Diana personally; her boys were right around Jeff's age and they had become friends. Bogg remembered the struggle Jeff had with letting the Titanic follow its historic course, but Jeff didn't _know_ those people like he knew the Princes or their mother. And even if they had known it would happen going into the assignment, it wouldn't have made it any easier. It was still a circumstance Bogg had not considered talking about with Jeff yet… and now it was too late.

"He blames me...for what...happened...back there," he was finally able to get out in ragged breaths. Tracy held him as he cried. "How was I sup—supposed to know she … she had to die?" He tried to regain control before going on. "He kept asking me… 'Why did they send us to my future? Wasn't the Omni supposed to stop at 1982? Why didn't they send us a guidebook or a note?' I told him that HQ must have felt we were the best team for the job, but a little bit of warning would have been nice! My God, Tracy, you should have seen Jeff last week, I was so proud of him: trying so hard to hold it together for William and Harry and fighting his own demons too. And I felt responsible for it all. I know I didn't send us to that assignment, but I still feel like I bear some responsibility for his suffering."

"But Phineas, you didn't know..."

"That's not the point!" He said loudly. She fell silent and listened. "Do you know what he asked me after the funeral? He asked me if I knew how it felt, looking at William, knowing he could have saved his mom."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing, what could I say? Then he said, 'No, you don't because you've never lost your parents!' "

Bogg curled up on the couch with his head in Tracy's lap, and she stroked his hair. He turned to look up at her. "He's right. I've never lost anyone close to me. I don't know how it feels. I tried to comfort him, and all I did was make him feel worse. I never should have let us stay there..." he trailed off as his eyes filled with tears.

Tracy was at a loss for words.'_What can I say? 'It'll be OK?' 'Jeff doesn't really blame you_?' She wanted to take away his pain but didn't know how or where to start. So she did the only thing she could do: sat there and held him.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_Sunday, September 21st, 1997_

The next day Tracy set about the day's chores and asked Bogg and Jeff to help her. Phineas seemed to benefit from the hard work, but Jeff would get up silently and do what he was asked, then go back to the front porch swing and sit. Bo followed him everywhere, knowing something was wrong. Simon had even tried to get him involved with feeding the horses, but Jeff's heart just wasn't in it. Simon used up the last of the feed just as lunch was being served, and Tracy decided to send the boys on an errand.

"You know, guys," Tracy said to the boys while they were eating, "I need some more feed for the horses, and the dogs could use some food too. Why don't you take..."

"The truck?" Simon blurted out. "I've got my permit and I'll drive safely! My Uncle Matt could come too! Please?"

Tracy laughed and shook her head. "No, not this time, Simon. Anyway, I need your uncle here. What I was going to say was take Brandy and the wagon into town to get what we need."

He sighed, "Oh all right. Hey Jeff! We can stop by the arcade on our way back. There are some cool new games that I know you'd love to see!"

Jeff just shrugged, "OK, sure. Whatever."

After lunch Kirk hitched Brandy to the wagon, and the boys climbed on. Bo, not wanting to miss any fun, jumped into the back of the wagon and barked happily. Simon clicked his tongue, slapped the reigns, and they were off. Tracy smiled to herself, knowing that if anyone could raise Jeff's spirits, Simon could.

Simon tried to talk to Jeff on the way to the Tack and Feed shop, but Jeff would only grunt or nod in response. When he asked Jeff what was wrong, he snapped, "I don't wanna talk about it," so they rode in silence the rest of the way there. They got what they needed from the tack and feed shop, then went to the arcade in town. Jeff just watched Simon play for a while, then found a game that hadn't been around in 1982: Mortal Kombat. He found it strangely comforting to smash heads and blow people into oblivion, something that didn't go unnoticed by his friend.

The boys had finally run out of quarters and headed back to the wagon. "You were pretty aggressive in there with that game, Jeff. Are you sure you don't wanna talk about what's bothering you?" Jeff didn't answer right away; he wanted to talk about it, but he didn't want to get all emotional again, either, which made him tear up. He tried to hide the tears, but Simon knew they were there. "I can't make you talk, Jeff, but I bet it would help you to get it off your chest. I owe you one from last year, remember?" He did remember listening while Simon vented his frustration, confusion and anger, trying to make sense of his mom leaving them. Simon witnessed many of his parents arguments before she'd left and Simon related these things to Jeff and more.

Jeff sighed, "Alright, alright. Fine, I'll talk." He told Simon that Phineas had been on assignment as a bodyguard for Princess Diana and when she went to Paris with Dodi, he was with Prince Charles and the boys in Scotland. He talked about the night of the accident, and how Phineas had called him at Balmoral Castle with the news. "It was just like finding out about my parents accident all over again," he said, and started to cry.

Simon nodded silently and tried to take it all in. He knew Jeff's parents had died in a car accident, and he tried to imagine what he was going through.

Embarrassed, Jeff wiped his eyes quickly, "It's been almost three years now, but it still hurts just like it did the day they died. It's so unfair, Simon! I just wish I could make this pain go away. I don't want to feel it anymore."

That statement triggered something in Simon. He didn't want to 'feel' anything last year, either. Then he'd met up with Jimmy. _Man, that stuff was good... _he thought. He felt a twinge of guilty pleasure, remembering the high. Then he remembered getting caught, the fights, the tears, the promises... He knew it was wrong to even think about doing it again, but...He'd been clean now for about 6 months, and he still missed it sometimes. By this time they'd come to a four way stop: Turn left and head home. Turn right... he could see the old barn from there. _We'll get the belt for sure if we get caught, but we'll only go this once... _He turned right at the crossroad.

"Where are we going?" Jeff asked him.

"Someplace where you won't have to feel that pain anymore," Simon answered.

The boys stopped in front of an old abandoned barn and got out of the wagon. Bo jumped down and started running around, sniffing the area. It had a familiar smell, one that Bo didn't like, and it made him sneeze.

"Stay close, boy!" Jeff yelled out as Bo disappeared into the brush, to which Bo responded with two short sharp barks.

Simon had gone ahead and knocked on the door of the barn. Jeff got there just as the door opened to let them in. It was dimly lit inside, and the air was thick with a musky-smelling smoke. Simon led him deeper into the barn, and Jeff was starting to get light-headed. They walked over to a tall, lanky teen of about 17 who gave Jeff the once over, then glared at Simon.

"Long time no see, Boyd. Where ya been, keepin' clean?" the teen taunted him. "I thought maybe you'd become to good for the likes of us."

Simon ignored the jab. "Jimmy, this is my friend Jeff," Simon said in a low voice. "He's got things he wants to forget, and I know you've got stuff that'll do that."

It was then that Jeff noticed a small, thin cigarette in the boy's hand. "You're smoking pot," Jeff said matter-of-factly. He was starting to relax in this hazy atmosphere and he was enjoying it.

"What's it to ya?" Jimmy responded. "Gotta problem with it?"

Simon leaned over and whispered into Jeff's ear, "If you don't wanna feel anything anymore, take a hit. I promise you, you'll feel a whole lot better."

Jeff looked the older teen in the eyes and said, "No, I don't 'gotta problem with it'. My friend here says you can make me forget my pain," he said and pointed to the joint. "Prove it."

Jimmy handed Jeff the joint. "Toke it slowly," he said, "to get the most out of it."

Jeff took the joint from him and looked at it. _What the hell do you think you're doing, _his voice echoed in his head. Every anti-drug speech he'd ever heard played in his mind as he stared at the joint. He knew it was wrong, but he was starting to feel good, and... what did it matter anyway? He took a drag on the joint like he had seen people smoke regular cigarettes, and promptly started to cough and choke.

A smatter of laughter came from the darkness around him, which was silenced by the older boy. "I said slowly. Try again, and this time, hold your breath for a minute." Jeff tried again, and a wave of peace and relaxation swept over him like he'd never felt before. He smiled, and so did Simon. They sat down and shared the joint, and Jeff was very happy: he felt nothing.

**

* * *

****A/N:** This was a very scary place for me to go, having no experience with drug use. I wanted to explore Jeff's darker/rebellious side, being a teen and all, and this seemed like an interesting way to do it. Of course, this also became a challenge to me as a writer to see if I could make it even _**remotely**_ believable. And as we progress... my challenge becomes bigger and bigger. 

I want to thank Toby for his invaluable help with the 'finer points of pot smoking'. Not usually something to be thanked for, but there you have it. Your input helped tremendously. Thank you.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

_Sunday, September 21st_

Once the boys had left, Tracy could focus her attention on Phineas. She decided to have him help some of the men pitch and bale a new load of hay that Ray and Kirk had brought in the other day. That should help him work out some of his frustration, she thought. It was a good choice.

_It's so unfair!_ Bogg thought as he jabbed his pitchfork into the hay and threw it into the baler. _Why did she have to die?_ The more he thought about it, the harder he stabbed at the hay. _Why did Jeff have to relive his parents' death? And how the heck did we get there in the first place?_

He got into a rhythm that the machine could hardly keep up with. The men paused a moment and watched him work, understanding how he felt: sometimes working through anger was the best way to deal with it. He started to tire, so Ray came over to help him finish the pile. Phineas looked at him and nodded his thanks. Ray nodded back and they worked together in silence.

* * *

Bo was lying in the wagon waiting for the boys to come out. They emerged from the barn staggering, and squinted at the sunlight. Bo got up and barked happily, jumping on Jeff, then he noticed The Smell and sneezed. Jimmy came out a moment later, and told the boys they were welcome back anytime. Bo gave a low growl and joined the boys in the wagon, never taking his eyes off of the teen. He knew Jimmy was trouble, and he didn't like that scent at all. Simon smelled like that a while back... the dog sighed as the wagon rolled towards home.

When the boys got back home late that afternoon, they brought the feed and dog food into the barn and unhitched Brandy from the wagon. Tracy called to Jeff, "Hey! I sure could use a hand getting supper ready!"

Jeff and Simon were already half way to the bunkhouse before Tracy had even started to speak, with Bo hot on their heels. He hollered back, "Simon wants to show me something at his place...can I do that first, please?"

"Oh, all right. But tomorrow night..."

"OK I promise!" was the already distant reply.

As she watched the two boys head off together, Bogg came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist and put his chin on her shoulder, startling her. He saw the boys just as they disappeared around the corner. "So, Jeff had a good time?" he asked.

"Yes, I think he did," she replied. "They were giggling like they shared some deep, dark secret, and Jeff was actually smiling!" She turned in his embrace to face him, and he smiled down at her. "Did I do good? Am I a good momma?"

"The best!" he said. "Now I just need to work on my parenting skills."

"Oh stop it! Stop it right now!" she gave him a swat on his shoulder. "You have done better than most men ever could have hoped to! You have been father and mother to him for over two years now, and look at him! He's doing better than most, I'd say!"

"Yeah, except for this last assignment..." He cringed, waiting for the second swat which arrived as anticipated.

"Phineas! We've been through this already. It's not your fault!"

He sighed deeply, "I know, I just still feel badly about the whole thing."

Tracy spun out of his arms and took his hand. "Would you help me with supper? I seem to have lost my first choice..."

"Your first choice? You picked the kid over me?" he shouted in mock indignation and Tracy laughed. "Why I oughtta..." She was running before he finished, and he chased her into the house.

Over the next several weeks, Jeff and Simon spent every spare second together. Bogg and Tracy were glad that he finally come out of his shell and had a friend his age to hang out with. He seemed to be feeling better and laughing more.

_Wednesday, October 1st_

As days progressed, Tracy noticed that Bogg seemed to be more like his old self again, and that made her happy. Phineas was taking a break so Tracy went over to the tree where he was sitting and sat down next to him. He was petting Katie and had a far-away look in his eyes. She leaned on his shoulder as she held his arm. "It's beautiful here, isn't it?"

"Huh? What," came his startled reply. "I'm sorry, I was off in another world. What did you say?"

"Oh, nothing," she replied, snuggling closer. "I was just saying how beautiful the scenery was..." She stared into his eyes, causing him to blush slightly. He put his arm around her and held her close.

"I knew coming here was the right thing to do," he said. "God knows we both needed it, and I needed you," he kissed her gently, and thought now would be as good a time as any... "Trace, I was thinking. Maybe Jeff and I can stick around for a while, you know, for more than just some much needed R & R... I know you've got enough hands here, but Jeff really misses you, and so do I. I've been thinking about you a lot lately, and well, I've been thinking of sticking here with you, if you'll have me... err.. us."

Her face lit up like a Christmas tree, "Oh Phineas that would be wonderful!" Then she sobered slightly. "But before you make that decision, be sure it's for all the right reasons." He looked at her, confused as she continued. "First of all, I'm still on Assignment, remember? This isn't my time, and as far as I know I'm not here permanently." Bogg frowned at that. It _was_ something he'd forgotten. Tracy brushed her hand across his cheek as she continued, "Second, don't stay here because of this last assignment. You're an amazing Voyager, and you know as well as I do that things like that happen..."

"Yeah, I know, I know!" he snapped. "I'm just so tired of it all..." he sighed, then softened his tone. "I'm sorry; this one just hurts so much. It's really the first time I've ever even started to consider hanging up my Omni. And I really like it here, too. I think I could get used to wor--" She sat up quickly, cutting him off.

"That's my point! It's not something you should have to 'get used' to! If you're going to stay, you should stay because _being here_ makes you happy. Not just being with me, although I have to admit I'm totally flattered," she gave a shy smile, "but you need to be happy with all of this: the ranch, the work, the animals. You would need to be happy here with me as well as without me." He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

Tracy grinned at him, "You know I'm right, Phineas."

After a moment, he found his voice. "I hadn't thought about it that way. I'll give it a little more time, and then I'll decide. Sound good?" She smiled at him and he fell in love all over again. _She's too good for me,_ he thought. He drew her close and kissed her again.

* * *

_Wednesday, October 15th, 1997_

After Simon got home from school, he and Jeff went off to their regular hang out: the old barn just outside of town. Bo came along as usual, but was not happy about it. When they got there, Bo looked at Jeff and whined, as if to say, "Oh please, not here again!"

Jeff just rubbed his head and said, "Don't worry, boy, we'll be fine. Just wait out here for us." Bo went and lay down by the barn door and sighed like only a depressed dog can.

Once inside, the boys paid Jimmy, went over to their usual spot and got down to business. Jeff relaxed as the high hit him, a little stronger than before. "What'd you put in here, Jimmy? This stuff is good," Jeff asked him.

"I kinda figured you were ready for some stronger stuff, kid," came the reply. "You are, aren't you?"

"Of course we are!" both boys said at once, and giggled. As they sat there getting high, one of the kids near Jeff fell asleep in a pile of hay with a lit roach in his hand. The old, dry hay didn't need any encouragement, and started to burn.

Bo snapped up from his sleep: something wasn't right. He sniffed the air. Smoke...Fire! He barked for Jeff and got no response, so he did what he had been trained to do...go for help.

Simon saw the fire, and pointed it out to the others in his group. Being high, they thought it was the funniest thing they'd ever seen, until the flames got about four feet tall. They tried to put it out, but it was too late. By that time, Bo was half way home.

* * *

Having finished mending fences with Matt and Tom, Bogg was walking along the stream and thought back to the conversation he'd had with Tracy about staying on at the ranch. He was starting to see what she had meant when she said, 'It's not something you should have to 'get used' to...you would need to be happy here with me as well as without me.' Oh, the work wasn't so hard, and the ranch was beautiful but he was starting to feel the "pull of the sea" once more. Having been a pirate, and being a Voyager for as long as he had, Phineas realized that he just couldn't stay in one place very long; he felt like he was missing something: action, adventure...anything that was happening where he wasn't.

He sighed heavily and came to a decision. He and Jeff would stay for two more weeks, then they would go "back to work", as it were. He reached into his pocket and drew out his Omni; he hadn't even looked at it in ages! He flipped it open and was startled by the sight that met his eyes: the Omni was red. Something was wrong in the here and now.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_Wednesday, October 15th _

Tracy was out on the porch reflecting on the past year and a half. She'd successfully purchased the Ranch from the Boyd's and with their help had turned it into a very profitable business once again. She still felt horrible about Debra leaving Kirk, even though she had done nothing wrong. Kirk had reassured her (repeatedly, it must be said) that things weren't as bad as she thought and that this separation had actually helped them work some things out. She sighed heavily and flipped open her Omni for the umpteenth time. Still Red. "What more do I have to _do _to get this dumb thing to turn green?"

She heard footsteps and saw Phineas approaching her with a concerned look on his face. Before she could ask what was wrong he held up his Omni, red light glaring. "It was Green when we landed here."

Now she was starting to get concerned. "You had a Green Light until just now? Well, that figures." Phineas gave her a quizzical look, to which she smiled ruefully, "I'm still on Assignment, remember? And mine is still red! You'd think I'd have figured it out and be done with it after being here for a year and a half, but no."

"Well, you bought the ranch, saving it from the auction block, didn't you? Wasn't that your assignment?"

Tracy sighed as she gazed into the clouds, "I'd been at VHQ when the assignment came in, and it was urgent. Garth personally rounded things up for me as he hurried me along, 'Keep the Boyd's from losing their ranch. It needs to stay in the family at all costs. Do whatever you need to, Reynolds, to get the job done.'"

Phineas laughed at the dead on impression of Garth and even Tracy had to smile. "I got sent out from VHQ with just enough info to get my foot in the door and enough money to buy the ranch. I'd been here about six months when I get a message from Garth telling me the assignment was going to be longer than expected and to 'keep up the good work.' At least your Omni was green last month, which means I must still be on the right track." She sighed and snapped her Omni shut. "Well, time to grab the old Guidebook and see--" Katie's whining cut her off. The dog was sitting straight up, looking down the road, ears pricked to catch whatever sound she was hearing. "What is it, girl?"

Katie ran toward the front gate and barked sharply twice. Bogg and Tracy were now on their feet, watching her. "It's gotta be Bo," Tracy said. Katie suddenly dashed off toward the bell in the center of the yard and started pulling on the rope with all her might. When Tracy started training the dogs for ranch work, she also taught them to ring the 'all hands' bell if there was trouble.

"What's that dern dog up to? What's going on?" Ray panted as he got there, followed by Matt, Kirk, Nick and Tom.

Bogg shrugged, "We're not sure...Wait! Tracy you were right. Here comes Bo!"

The dog came racing through the gate and down the path to where the bell hung. Katie went over and nuzzled him, whining.

"What is it, boy? What's wrong," Tracy asked the tired dog. Bo sneezed and barked incessantly, running around the small group then down the road and back again. Then Katie started in, barking and jumping. Tracy called the dogs to her and gave the hand signal to sit. They obeyed but Bo was quivering, barely able to hold still. "Now, lets try again. Bo, alert." He barked three times and pawed the air: the signal for fire.

"Do you think he can lead us to the fire?" Phineas asked as Nick and Tom ran to the barn to get the fire extinguishers.

Bo ran up and down the driveway. "Looks like he's trying to do just that," Tracy said tersely as she motioned him to her truck. Not wanting to be left out, Katie jumped into the back of the truck.

It was then that Phineas noticed that the kids were not part of the group. "Hey, Trace, where are the kids?" Bo barked again, ran to him then ran up the road again. Bogg looked at Tracy, fear in his eyes. This had to be why the Omni was red!

Kirk had been watching the dog as he frantically tried to lead them to the fire. _'He keeps sneezing for no reason,_' he thought as they loaded the equipment. _'The last time he did that was when Simon... no, he's been clean for a while...' _Bo sneezed again and pawed at Kirk's leg before running down the road again. Kirk's face clouded over, the anger and fear warring within him.

Tracy pulled up and Kirk climbed into the truck after Phineas. "I'll bet it's the old Johnson barn," Kirk said darkly as the two vehicles followed Bo down the road.

"Why do you think it's there?" Tracy asked.

"Do you remember last year, when Simon got in with that crowd? You know, hanging out with that Jimmy kid?" She nodded. "Well, Bo never cared for him much, and he'd always sneeze whenever Jimmy was nearby. That was how we discovered Simon had been smokin' that damn weed..."

"Weed?" Phineas looked confused.

Kirk rolled his eyes, "You know, pot? Marijuana?"

"Jeff's been hanging out with a drug addict?"

"Now hold on there, Phin! Simon's been clean now for 6 months!" Kirk snapped back in defense of his son.

"Quiet! Both of you!" Tracy yelled above the men. "We'll deal with that later, if it's even an issue! We've got to..." She trailed off as she saw the smoke rising above the trees. "Oh dear God... " Her radio crackled with the call from Tom in the second truck, alerting the Fire Department. She slowed down long enough for Bo to scramble into the back of the truck, then raced to the burning barn.

All 9 boys had gotten out of the barn and watched as the blaze got bigger. Jimmy, on the other hand, was busy saving his investment. As he was putting the weed and paraphernalia back in the shed beyond the barn, Tracy and Tom pulled up. The kids started to scatter, but were quickly rounded up by Matt, Nick and Ray.

"Are all of you outta there?" Ray asked the dazed group. They just stood there, staring at the burning barn, and said nothing. He turned to Simon, "Is there anyone else in the barn?"

He looked around the small group and thought very hard, "Umm, I think, maybe, ahh...I don't see Jimmy..."

"There might still be kids in the barn!" Ray yelled. Kirk and Tom ran inside just as Jimmy walked out of the bushes behind the barn.

"Kirk! I hear the fire department," Matt yelled, "Get outta there!" A moment later, the front of the barn collapsed and became a wall of fire.

"Oh my God, no!" Tracy screamed.

"Kirk! Tom!" Matt yelled.

Matt and Tracy started toward the barn, but were stopped by Phineas, Nick, and Ray. "Let me go!" She struggled in vain against Ray.

"My brother's in there!" Matt cried, fighting Bogg and Nick as they held firm and tried to calm him down.

"The fire department is here, Matt! Let them do their job!"

As the two fire trucks pulled up, the dogs took off toward the barn.

"Bo! Katie! Stop!" Phineas commanded. The dogs paid no heed as they raced to the back of the barn.

The group was moved away from the barn as the firemen attacked the fire. Nick went to one of the firemen and was told him there were two men still inside. As he gave the order to send in a search team, Bo and Katie came out from behind the barn with Tom and Kirk in tow. A cheer went up from the group.

Phineas and Matt ran over to the men and helped them over to one of the trucks. As they caught their breath and cleared their lungs, Matt looked over at the group of kids and noticed Jimmy standing off to one side. _He wasn't even in the barn..._ Matt thought. He was all over Jimmy before the kid knew what hit him.

"My brother ran into a burning barn save your sorry hide and you weren't even in there!" He brought him over to the group of adults. "Here's who you went in after...He wasn't in the barn at all!"

When Kirk saw him, he lunged at Jimmy. Nick barely stopped him and held him back, and Kirk's eyes burned with hatred. "You little bastard! You nearly destroyed my family last summer! I almost got killed today thanks to you!"

"Don't start you self-righteous crap with me, man! They came on their own! He's the one that wanted the stuff," He pointed to Jeff. "They came to me."

Phineas turned in shock and looked at Jeff. He was standing with the other kids with a glassy, far off look in his eyes. Stunned, he walked over to Jeff. "Kid? Jeff, is it true?"

"Yeah, what's it to ya?" Jeff responded. He looked at Simon, and they giggled.

Phineas grabbed Jeff by the shoulders, "Jeff! Why? You're smarter than that! Don't do this!"

Jeff stared at him a moment, with a goofy grin on his face, then said, "But, it feels so...good. It makes me happy. And, I don't have to think about...about..." he turned to Simon, "what was it I was trying to forget? Oh well, this stuff did its job." Both boys burst into a giggling fit.

Just before they got the fire out, Sheriff Hayes pulled up along with two deputies. Tracy and Tom filled him in as the deputies led the kids to the waiting squad cars. Sheriff Hayes walked over to Jimmy and took him by the arm. "Haven't we done this already?" Jimmy just glared at him as Hayes put him in his squad car. He turned back to Tracy, "My men'll take these kids back to the station for a stern talkin' to before we call their parents. I should book Simon this time around, but I think this was a good wake up call, especially with his dad bein' in danger and all."

"Thanks, Sheriff. I mean it." Tracy shook his hand and went looking for Phineas.

Jimmy surveyed the scene from the back of the squad car and tried to find something, anything, that would give him leverage. Simon and Jeff were obviously being lectured by Simon's dad and another man Jimmy didn't know. _Must be Jeff's dad or something,_ he thought. He watched the barn smoulder, then saw Tracy pull Phineas aside to talk as some of the other men called the dogs and got them in the trucks to head home. _I knew Boyd was gonna be trouble! I've been doin' this for three years, and the ONLY time I get caught is when that yahoo needs a hit or has a new buddy he wants to hook up. Simon needs to be taught a lesson. _He watched Kirk lead Simon to one of the trucks, and then the plan started to take shape in Jimmy's head._ Oh, I'm gonna make them pay for this. Him and his goody-goody friends. _He sat silently as the Sheriff got in and headed for the station.

"You are in big trouble, mister," he said as they headed into town. "As if last year wasn't bad enough... don't you kids ever learn?" Hayes continued to lecture Jimmy all the way into town, but he wasn't listening. He was busy planning on how he was gonna make Simon pay.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

_Friday, October 17th_

Two days after the fire, things were still tense at the ranch. Bogg didn't know how to deal with the fact that Jeff was using drugs, and every time he tried to talk to him, Jeff would just shut him out or they would end up in a shouting match. Tracy tried to keep the peace, but neither of them would let her.

Then there was Kirk and Simon. They had been down this road before, and neither of them wanted to deal with the meeting they new had to take place. Simon avoided his dad by hiding out in his room. Tracy finally convinced him he needed to talk to his dad before things got worse, and he reluctantly agreed.

Simon wandered into his dad's room and stood there a moment, waiting for him to say something. Kirk just sat silently, so he took a deep breath, "Umm, I'm umm, sorry Dad. I was just trying to help Jeff..." now that he'd begun, the words came pouring out. "I know I shouldn't have done it, but he was hurting and he said he didn't want to feel anymore...then I thought back to last summer when Mom..." he briefly made eye contact with his father and saw the painful memory cross his face. "...well, you know, I just wanted to help him feel better and I thought we would only go that one time...I didn't mean to fall off the wagon, honest! I'm really sorry!"

"Son, come sit down a minute." He patted the bed and Simon walked over to him and sat down. "Now, I understand that you were just trying to help him, but why pot? You know it didn't fix anything before--"

"I know, Dad, but it was the only way I could cope! It hurt so bad when she left, and when I was at the barn, it didn't matter anymore. I just didn't care, and it felt good to not care, ya know? And when Jeff started talking about how his parents died, and how much he wanted the pain to go away... well, I just wanted to give him the same escape I had. I'm really sorry, Dad."

Kirk nodded and put his arm around his son. "I know, kiddo, I know. Believe me, if I'd had the option to not feel that pain every day... But it's not an option. Someone once told me that pain is Life's way of telling you your alive, even if you don't wanna be. You gotta feel, Simon. The good and the bad."

Simon nodded and stared at the floor, struggling with his emotions. He sighed heavily. "How much trouble am I in?"

Kirk looked at his only son, his own wounded heart trying to cope with the situation and yet still be a good father. He held out his hand and simply said, "Wallet."

Simon's heart was in his throat in a second, all the blood rushing to fill the void it left in his chest. He slowly pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and handed it to his dad. Kirk opened it and took out the one thing that meant more to Simon than anything: his driving permit. He willed himself not to cry as his dad took the permit and put it in his own wallet.

"One month. And then we'll see." Simon nodded and his dad continued, "You'll also be mucking the stalls for two weeks. I'll be adding to that, but that's it for starters."

He nodded at his father and sighed. At least he wasn't making him go through the12-step program again. He got up from the bed and walked dejectedly towards the door.

Later in the day as Simon was doing his chores, he saw Jeff walking out to the barn with Bo. They looked at each other uneasily and Jeff continued on. _Say something to him or you'll regret it. _Simon's conscience had been eating at him since talking to his dad, and he knew it was now or never. "Hey, Jeff."

He turned around and looked back at Simon. "Yeah, what do you want?"

"Umm, well, I ah, I wanted to say...umm...I'm sorry."

Jeff looked at him, confused. "For what?"

"For taking you to meet Jimmy and the pot and all..." he trailed off and looked at Jeff.

"What are you sorry for?" Jeff asked him. "This past month has been the best of my life, until two days ago, that is. Why would you apologize?"

"Because we shouldn't have gone in the first place," Simon replied.

"Why not?"

Simon sighed heavily. Jeff wasn't making this easy. "Because it was wrong, and I knew it when I did it."

Now Jeff was getting aggravated. "So why'd you do it if you knew it was wrong? Were you lookin' to get us in trouble?"

"No, no! I just thought, I mean, I remembered how good it felt to not care about things, and I just wanted to give you that chance, that's all. I was trying to help!"

"Yeah, well, you've helped plenty. Jimmy's in jail and we've got no pot. How's that supposed to help me, Simon, huh? How? Just quit trying to help me, OK?" He ran off to the barn, Bo faithfully at his heels. Simon just stood there, speechless.

Jeff ran inside and closed the door, narrowly missing Bo's tail, and flopped onto the closest pile of hay available. It had been two days. Two days of hell, as far as he was concerned. No pot, no peace, Bogg and Tracy hovering over him like he was some sick little kid...the tears came unbidden. Bo came over, lay down on Jeff's chest and licked his face. He grabbed the dog in a bear hug around the neck and cried in frustration. Everything he'd been trying to forget had found its way back into his mind, and it wouldn't let go. If he could just get high one more time...

* * *

_Later that day_

Jimmy paced around his cell like a caged tiger. _I gotta get out of this rap somehow but how?_ He thought. _The cops found my stash behind the barn, and because I got caught last year dealing to Simon they're gonna stick it to me, good! I've gotta get to my extra stuff..._ His reverie was cut short by the arrival of Sam Curry, the guard on duty.

Sam walked over to the cell, keys in hand. "I just don't get it," he said, shaking his head. "Who in their right mind would post your bail?" He stopped and looked at Jimmy through the bars. "Well, someone on the outside likes you, 'cuz you're free to go, until this Tuesday that is."

Jimmy stared at the officer in shock. _Posted bail? Free to go? Who..._

"Hey, kid, don't say 'ole Sam never did nuthin' for ya," he said as he unlocked the door. Jimmy bolted out.

"Where's my jacket? Where's my stuff?"

"Relax, kid. It's all right here," he reached for a box behind the desk and gave Jimmy his things. As Jimmy turned to leave, Sam grabbed his arm. "Now remember, you have a court date next Tuesday the 21st at 9 a.m. We're trusting you to behave till then. Think you can handle that?"

"Of course, Officer Curry. I'll be on my best behavior," he smiled. "Scouts honor."

Sam eyed Jimmy warily. "Now, don't go smartin' off at me boy..."

"I'm not, sir. I've learned my lesson, believe me. No more dealing, honest. I just wanna clean up and get on with my life."

"Well, all right then." Officer Curry led Jimmy to the door. "See you next week at 9 a.m. sharp."

"Yes, sir! You will!"

Once he was far enough away from the station, Jimmy broke into a run. _Seven-Eleven,_ he thought. Once he got there, he ran behind the building, went to the large dumpster and moved it. "Still here!" he crowed. He pulled the old dirt bike out of its hiding place and then froze as a sinister voice came from the shadows.

"You're off in a hurry, aren't you Jim? You weren't gonna forget about us now, were you?"

Panic rose in him; he knew that voice. "Ah, no sir! I saved all the stuff from the fire, it's -"

"Behind the remains of the barn? I don't think so. They found it, Jim, but we're betting that you were smarter than that. They didn't find it all, now, did they? We want the rest of it." The teens blood ran cold, and the Voice continued. "The Crew has decided you could do us more good out here than rotting in that cell, so we posted your bail. You could go far with us, Jim. Prove yourself."

Jimmy waited until the sound of the footsteps faded then let out a long, slow breath. "Man, that was close!" He went to the wall of the store and removed a brick, then two. There, in the hole, was his stash of harder drugs he was saving for some of the kids who would work well with The Crew. "This will save my skin for sure!" He got the bundle out of its hiding place and replaced the bricks. "It'll also help with my other problem. You've messed up my life for the last time Boyd."

He put the bundle in his jacket and jumped on the bike. "Please start..." He put the key in the ignition, turned it and kick-started the bike. It sputtered and died. "Come on baby, start!" He tried again, and the ignition caught. As the dirt bike roared to life, he popped a wheelie and rode out onto the street in a squeal of rubber and smoke.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Saturday, October 18, 1997_

Jeff sat on the couch glaring at the two adults across the room. As if taking away his one means of escape wasn't enough, now they wanted him to go to counseling. He glanced over at Bogg and said sarcastically, "So, how are you gonna get me to go? I don't want to go. I don't need a shrink."

"Oh, you don't think so? Well, you're not the same kid I've been with these past two years. Look at yourself, Jeff!"

"Yeah, well, this is the new me. No more of that 'little kid' stuff. I'm 14 and I've grown up a lot in the past month. I'm tired of being treated like a kid and I'm tired of you." Pain and anger stabbed at Phineas' heart, and his face showed it.

Tracy looked at Jeff in shock, "Jeffrey!" He glanced over at Tracy, then at a stunned Phineas, and just shrugged. "Jeff, this isn't like you. Why are you doing this?"

"Because life stinks and if I can't make peoples lives better by being a Voyager, then what's the point? We couldn't even save Princess Diana..."

"But we made history right, kid!" Bogg interjected then went on before Jeff could cut him off. "If we'd had a Guide Book, we'd have known about the crash. Wouldn't that have been worse? To know how she had to die and ensure that it actually happened? And I told you before I _tried _to go with them, but the Omni was red. Did you ever stop to consider that _**I**_ _could haved_ _died_ if I'd gone in Trevor's place?" Jeff's eyes widened slightly as he tried valiantly to not react to that information. "It happened the way it was supposed to, Jeff. She had to die."

"But why did she have die like that? And what about Harry and Wills? We couldn't even spare them the grief of losing their mom! If that's what being a Voyager is all about then I don't want any part of it!" He stood up and started to walk out, then turned to them and said, "I'm not the one who needs help-it's you two."

Phineas jumped up and grabbed him by the arm. "I don't think you get it, kid. Being a Voyager isn't about you, me or anyone else. It's about making and keeping things right. Should we have stopped Hitler or Ghengis Khan? I know! We should have been there to save the Titanic!"

Jeff rolled his eyes, "We were there, remember?"

"That's my point! We were there and even though we, ok you, knew what was going to happen, we couldn't stop it! How many people died needlessly in that horrible tragedy? How many children lost their parents that night?" Jeff stared icily at Bogg as he continued, "There are just some things we can't change."

"But it's not fair!" Jeff wrenched away from Bogg. "No one understands what I mean! You just don't get it! I'm outta here," he said, ran from the room and out the front door.

"Jeff! Jeffrey!" They called after him, to no avail. Phineas sank back down on the couch and covered his face with his hands. As Tracy put her arm around him to hug him, he looked at her, "What are we going to do?" Her only answer was to sigh and hold him close.

* * *

Jimmy had been in the barn for a while, finalizing his plan. "This'll be perfect if I can get Boyd to cooperate." He started playing with the joint he'd brought, twirling it in his fingers. "OK, he smokes this LSD laced joint, I shoot him up, and start the fire." He looked up into the loft at the beams suspended above his head, "Pity they're putting new support beams in now. It's such a waste of money since there won't be anything left to sup--" The sudden flood of light from the opening door brought him out of his planning. He dove into a stall, dropping the joint in his rush for cover. 

"GAAAAAHHHHH!" Jeff screamed at the top of his lungs. "God, I hate them! Counseling! Jeeze!" Jimmy watched from the safety of the stall as Jeff ranted and raved. "I just can't believe them! Why can't they just leave me alone? Stupid adults..." he kicked at a pile of hay. "What good is going to see a shrink gonna do me? I swear...if they even try to..." He stopped short as something on the ground caught his eye. "What's this?" As he bent down, recognition flooded him and his heart began to race.

Jimmy paled as he grabbed his shirt pocket. The joint was gone. _Damnit! Not him! _He watched as Jeff stood there motionless, staring at the joint.

Jeff held the long thin cigarette in his trembling hands, looked around the barn, then went to one of the windows to look outside. Jimmy couldn't believe it, _He's gonna do it! He wasn't who I was looking for, but this could work! _

All hands were out with the herd and both dogs were with them. Jeff knew he only had a few minutes before anyone came looking for him...this was his chance. He took a long, slow smell of the joint and smiled. "This is going to be great..." Jeff sat down to smoke the joint, then realized he didn't have anything to light it with. He frowned, then got up and walked over to the lantern on the back wall. On a ledge below the lantern were the matches. Jeff grabbed the matches, went back to his spot on the floor and lit up. This was the best he'd felt in days.

Jimmy didn't have to wait long for the drugs to take effect.

Jeff was screaming, swatting at imaginary bugs and God only knows what else. He turned and ran, only to meet up with another "monster"; but this time, the monster was real. Jimmy grabbed him and said mockingly, "Here, you need some Heroin to go with the pot and LSD." In one swift move he had Jeff pinned to the floor with one arm outstretched and secured under his knee. He quickly grabbed a syringe from his pocket and popped the cover off the needle. Then he stuck it into Jeff's arm and depressed the plunger, smiling wickedly. "Now for a real show."

It wasn't more than two minutes later that the real horrors began. Jeff tried to get up and run but his body refused to comply. He fell to the floor and clutched his head. "Make it stop! Please! Go away, leave me alone!" he screamed and rolled around. He tried to fight off the "demon" that was attacking him, but he couldn't make his body obey. The world started to spin. "Help...please..." he looked up at Jimmy who just laughed. "Bogg..." his voice dropped off as he lost consciousness.

Jimmy looked at Jeff and reviewed his plan, wandering around the barn. "OK, so it's not Boyd. This is almost as good though, since they are friends. How do I make this as damaging as possible?" He grabbed one of several ropes hanging from the hayloft, and a new plan began to form. "Oh, if I can make this work... this is gonna be good!"

He grabbed Jeff and climbed up the ladder to the loft then lay Jeff down. He picked his way over and around various ropes and beams, until he found what he was looking for. He picked up a rope and a cargo net for a truck, "Yeah, this just might work!" He laid the net out on the floor and put Jeff in the middle of the net with his head through one of the gaps. He then threaded the rope through the holes from the middle of his back to his neck. "This way," he muttered as he tightened the rope, "I'll look like he tried to hang himself!" He tugged on the last knot and tossed the rope over the pulley and down to the floor. "That's perfect!" he shouted jubilantly. He scrambled down the ladder. "Now I've just gotta get him started up..."

As he started to hoist Jeff into the air he heard someone outside. "Jeff! C'mon, kid! Where are you? Can't we talk about this? Jeff!"

Jimmy peered out the window and saw Bogg coming towards the barn. "Oh, man, not him! Not now! He's gonna ruin everything!" Just then, another idea struck him. "Or, maybe not. I just need..." he glanced around quickly until he found what he needed, "...this! Perfect!" He grabbed the two by four and hid behind the barn door. The wait was as agonizing as it was pleasurable.

Bogg stopped in front of the barn door and called Jeff once more. Getting no response, he turned around and started to go back to the house and sighed. _I guess I'll leave him alone a while longer. I just wish I could get through to him! _

Just then, he heard a sound from the barn. "Jeff?" He called as he headed for the barn once more. "Kid? It's me, Bogg." No response. "Okay, I'm coming in."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_Saturday, October 18th_

After Phineas went out to look for Jeff, Tracy went to her room and closed the door. She was at a complete loss as how to deal with a teenager, and an angry one at that. She sighed and sat on the edge of her bed, thinking back to her childhood and her own brother, and tried to remember how her parents dealt with him when he was 'in a mood', as her mother so delicately put it. _'Prayer is always a good place to start,'_ her mothers voice chattered in her head.

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future," she recited and laughed. "Mom always had her unshakable faith to turn to," she sighed, looking heavenward. "God, please help them work this out. They need each other and I need them. Please let them talk and not yell at each other." She went over to her window and watched Phineas walk into the barn and sighed, "I just hope they can work things out."

* * *

Jimmy's heart raced as the barn door slowly opened. "Jeff?" Bogg called in a hoarse whisper. "Kid? Where are you?" 

_Just a few more steps..._ Jimmy gripped the two-by-four in both hands like a large baseball bat. _A little further..._

"C'mon Jeff, please...?" Bogg glanced around and walked completely through the door into the barn.

Jimmy crept behind Phineas and swung the board with all his strength. CRACK! Bogg collapsed to the floor in a heap. "Yes!" Jimmy cried jubilantly. He dragged Phineas over in front of the loft and propped him against the wall. He went and quickly closed the barn doors and locked them from the inside. "Now to start that fire," he said, walking over to some bales of what he thought was hay. "This looks a little too green to burn... Oh well, as long as it makes lots of smoke! Now where did I put those matches?" He lit a match, then two, and laid them on the hay. "C'mon! Please catch!" He held his breath as the fire caught and slowly started to burn the bale.

A flash, incredible pain, then darkness. Phineas was barely conscious when he was dragged from where he fell. _Jeff... _His head swam in disjointed images, refusing to form anything coherent. He could hear someone talking far away but couldn't make out the words. "Uhhhhh...J-Jeff?"

Jimmy jumped at the sound. "Hot Damn! Good timing there Pops." Jimmy started smacking Phineas on the face and shaking him. "Hey, come on. I don't have all day, you know."

Phineas responded slowly, "J-Jeff? Where's...where's Jeff...?"

"If you'd get up, I'd tell you, man," Jimmy said. He grabbed Phineas by the arms and pulled him to his feet. Bogg swayed and staggered in disorientation. "C'mon Pops, you've only got a concussion. You gotta save Jeff."

"Save him? From...from what?" His head was pounding and his stomach was turning. Jimmy took Bogg's hands and put the rope between them.

"Hang on to this and don't let go. There's a fire in the barn and Jeff is hanging onto one of the new support beams up in the loft. You gotta pull it up; you gotta save him, man! Pull that rope and keep him up so he won't get hurt!" He started to cough as the smoke wafted through the barn.

As Phineas started pulling on the rope, Jimmy thought he heard barking. He ran to the window and saw Bo and Katie followed by the ranch hands, back from checking up on the herd. "Damn it! Not now!"

He ran back over to the bales in the corner which were now just smouldering and putting off a lot of smoke. "I need this stuff to burn! C'mon you stupid hay, burn!" He lit a few matches and ignited one corner of the bale. "Good enough! I've gotta get outta here!" He crawled out a side window, got on his bike and watched as smoke started coming out of the window. "So long, losers," he said with an evil smile, then sped away.

* * *

Bo and Katie went racing into the house looking for their mistress. It didn't take them long to find her curled up on the couch in the den where they promptly jumped on her. "Hello, kids!" Tracy said as she pushed them off of her. "Did you have fun chasing the cows?" The duo barked happily, tails wagging. 

"Yes ma'am, they sure did," Matt said as he wandered in. "That herd is looking better than ever, thanks to you."

Tracy blushed at the praise. "Thanks Matt. Just another month or so and you and your brother will be back in charge and I can retire."

Matt nodded and laughed, "You know that's all we're waitin' for, Miss Tracy."

"Now, how about you two," she asked the dogs and got two dog biscuits off the mantle. "Ya ready? Sit..." Both dogs promptly sat down, never taking their eyes off the biscuits. "Katie, jump!" She jumped sideways over her brother, then completed the routine before Tracy could give the commands: she laid down, rolled over, spun in a circle, sat up, begged, and barked twice. Matt and Tracy burst out laughing. "You're supposed to wait for me to tell you to do it, you goofy dog," Tracy said as she made Bo spin in a circle by waving his biscuit over his head. "Oh all right, here." She tossed the treats in the air and the dogs caught them, then went to the kitchen to eat their rewards.

"You've got the best trained dogs around, Miss Tracy," Matt said.

"Well, I owe a lot of that to Simon. He's so good with any animal. By the way, did you guys see Jeff or Phineas as you ca-"

She was cut off by shouts from outside. Simon came running in, "Miss Tracy come quick! There's a fire in the barn!"

Tracy and Matt were almost tripped by the dogs as they all ran outside. "Look!" Simon cried as he pointed to the smoke coming out of the back of the barn.

"Oh my God! I think Jeff and Phineas are in there!" Tracy cried.

"Are you sure?" Matt asked her.

"Yes! Jeff ran off a while ago, and I watched Phineas go into the barn about ten minutes after that, and I haven't seen either of them since!"

Matt ran to the phone to call the Fire Department as Simon ran out to the others. "Dad! Jeff and Bogg are in there!" he shouted to his father who was trying to open the doors.

"Phineas! Can you hear me?" Kirk called as the others went around the back of the barn to see if they could open a side door. "Phin! Open the door! Phineas!"

"We can't get them open!" Ray shouted. He turned and yelled to Tracy, "We need to pull the main doors off! Get over here with that truck!"

_

* * *

_

"I've got...to...keep...t-trying..." The fire had grown and the smoke was heavier making it harder to breathe or see. Bogg tried to focus on the loft to find Jeff as he continued to pull the rope with all his might, pulling Jeff higher into the air. The rope groaned under the strain and Jeff started spinning slowly. Phineas started coughing, making his head explode in a prism of color and pain. He clutched his head and Jeff fell to the loft floor with a thud. Hearing that, Phineas grabbed the rope and once more pulled Jeff back up into the air.

* * *

"Hurry! There's no time!" Kirk and Tom attached a chain through the handles of the barn doors and locked it together with a padlock. "Punch it, Tracy!" 

Her heart racing in fear, she hit the accelerator, churning up a cloud of dust. "Sweet Jesus let them be OK..." She clenched the wheel as the chain reached its full extension and strained at the doors. "Come on baby!" She said to the truck, and gave it more gas.

"Stand back!" Tom yelled, "They're gonna go!"

Tracy looked in the rear view mirror to see what was happening. "C'mon! Please give!" She pushed harder on the gas and the doors suddenly gave way. The truck lurched forward, finally free of its burden. Tracy stopped and jumped out, running to the barn.

* * *

Phineas heard a loud cracking noise behind him. Thinking it was the fire, he used the last of his strength to pull Jeff to "safety", causing is head to pound like thunder. He frantically pulled at the rope, calling, "Jeff! Hold on..." Just then, the doors to the barn came off, pulling the smoke to the front of the barn and out. He cried out in pain, and collapsed to the ground, unconscious. 


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 

As soon as the doors were off, Bo and Katie charged in. Tracy and the others tried to follow the dogs, but were driven out by the smoke. Matt grabbed some rags and a bottle of water from the back and started handing them out.

"Pour water on these, and cover your nose with it so you can breathe." They did as he said, then headed for the barn. Tom, Nick and Ray went to the back of the barn where the smoke was coming from, fire extinguishers ready to go. They found the bale and quickly put out the small fire.

Just then, Tracy heard the dogs bark. They'd found someone! The smoke was clearing, but still thick in the air, and Tracy couldn't see more than two feet in front of her. "Bo, Katie, Alert!" Katie barked in response.

"To the left, by the loft!" Tracy said as she and Matt ran inside. When Tracy saw Phineas on the ground she screamed, "Phineas, No!"

Matt ran over, knelt down next to him, and checked for a pulse while Bo and Katie stared at him. "He's alive and breathing!"

"Oh, thank God!" Tracy said as she knelt down beside them and hugged the dogs. "Good boy, good girl!" she said. "Now, go find Jeff!" Bo barked once and ran deeper into the barn, nose to the ground. Katie just sat there staring at Phineas as Tracy took his hand.

"We need to get him outta here," Matt said. Tracy started to help, but he shooed her away. "You go find the young'un, I'll be fine."

"Are you sure? I don't want to leave him..." she said as she scanned what she could see of the barn.

"Yes, I've got him, now go." Matt pulled Phineas into a sitting position, put him over his shoulder in a fireman's carry and took him outside. Katie followed behind them.

Tracy got up and started calling, "Jeff! Jeffrey where are you?" The smoke was clearing but it was still heavy enough to make her cough. Movement to her right caught her eye and she called out, "Jeff? Is that you?"

"No, it's me, Simon," was the reply.

"Did you find him?" She asked.

"Not yet," he answered, "but I'll let you know as soon as I do."

"Miss Tracy!" Tom called from the back of the barn.

"Over by the loft, Tom!" she called back, and started to cough again.

"We got the fire out, ma'am. Lucky for us, it was just the alfalfa, but it didn't take real well. Mostly just made a ton of smoke..." he stopped short due to a coughing fit, as if to make his point. He finished and looked over at Tracy, realizing she was not really paying attention to him, but scanning the area. "What is it, ma'am?"

"I'm sorry Tom. I can't find Jeff and I'm pretty certain he was still in here...did you boys see him back there?"

"No ma'am. No one back there but us..." he turned and called to the others in the barn, "Hey guys! Jeff's still missing! Spread out!" He turned back to Tracy, "Don't worry, ma'am, if he's in here, we'll find him!"

Bo had run all around the barn and checked every stall looking for his boy. He was on his way outside to see if Jeff had gone out when he caught the scent...his boy! He looked around and whimpered, confused. The smell was coming from up, not down. He jumped on top of a bale of hay, sniffed the air again and sneezed from the smoke, and a certain familiar smell... His boy was definitely up there.

As Bo carefully picked his way up the stacks of hay to the loft, Nick stopped to watch him a moment. "Now, just what is that crazy dog up to?"

Tracy called again for Jeff, with no response. Kirk came over and put his arm around her. "Now Miss Tracy. Why don't you go outside and see if maybe Jeff's just hidin' out there? We'll find him, don't worry. The smoke's pretty much cleared out, so if he's in here, he shouldn't be too hard to find."

She looked around and sighed. "All right. Just be sure to-" Bo's frantic barking cut her off. She looked around but couldn't find him. "Bo! Where are you boy?"

He barked again, then whimpered.

"Up there! In the hayloft!" Simon called. Tracy ran for a ladder and started climbing.

"Jeff!" She cried when she saw him lying there. As she tried to climb over the beams, she called out, "Someone pull these things outta my way!"

"I'm on it!" Nick called out. He grabbed the closest rope and started to pull. Tracy stared in horror as she saw Jeff rise into the air in the cargo net. The support rope shifted in the netting, creating a noose effect around Jeff's neck.

"Jeff, No!" She screamed and scrambled as best she could over the beams to Bo, joining in his frantic tug-of-war with Jeff's limp body. "Lower him, Nick, lower him! Oh my God, get him down!"

Nick paled and quickly lowered Jeff down then ran up the ladder. "Miss Tracy! I didn't know...I never meant to...Oh my God, I didn't know!" He crawled over to Tracy as she struggled to get his head untangled from the net.

"I can't get the netting off, Nick! He's not breathing, hurry!" Nick pulled open his pocket knife and cut the netting away from Jeff's neck.

"The Fire Department's here!" Simon yelled up to them. The rest of them gathered at the ladder, not believing what they had just witnessed.

Tracy was already straddling Jeff, trying to start his heart. "One, two, three, four, five," she counted off, then paused and resumed. "C'mon Jeff! Stay with us!" Tracy pleaded.

Nick tilted Jeff's head back, opened his mouth and started blowing air into his lungs. "Please, kid, breathe!" he said between breaths.

* * *

Matt was trying to revive Phineas when he heard Tracy scream. Before he could make up his mind where to go, he heard the wail of sirens as two ambulances and a fire truck pulled up. Matt waved one group of EMT's over to his truck as Tom was walking out of the barn. The firemen headed in with the other EMT's, but not before Tom had informed them that the fire was out and about what had happened to Jeff.

As the EMT's worked on Phineas, Tom came over to the truck to fill Matt in. "Nick an' Miss Tracy are giving Jeff CPR," he said in a stunned voice. "Somehow he got tangled in a net and he was hung..."

Matt was in shock. "Hung? What the hell happened in there?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, Matt. Hey, how's Phineas? He OK?"

"He's out cold," the lead EMT replied. "He's got a huge lump on the back of his head but I think he'll be OK."

They were moving him from the truck bed to a stretcher when they heard Tracy cry; "He's breathing!"

Matt and Tom ran in and watched Nick climb down the ladder with Jeff over his shoulder. The EMT's took him from Nick, put him on the stretcher and wheeled him out to the second ambulance. Tracy was still up in the loft, hugging Bo and crying. As Nick got to the ground, Kirk climbed up the ladder. Tracy still had a death grip on the dog and Kirk slowly peeled her off of him. Bo licked his mistress' face, then ran to the loft edge and climbed down the hay bales and ran after Nick.

"Tracy," Kirk said gently. "Miss Tracy..." She sat there mutely. He gently touched her shoulder, "Miss Tracy, they're safe now, it's OK. Come on..."

She slowly focused her eyes on him. "Jeff...Phineas...I almost lost them both. Oh my God, Kirk, I almost lost them..." She couldn't take the stress any longer and collapsed into Kirk's arms, sobbing hysterically.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Once Jeff and Phineas had been taken to the hospital, Nick, Ray and Tom worked with the fire department and the Sheriff to discover what they could about what happened. Simon had tried to go with Tracy, his dad and uncle to the hospital, but Kirk was firm. "Not yet, son. We need you here. As a matter of fact, I think Bo and Katie could use a friend right about now. They can't understand why we're taking their people away. Why don't you take them out to the back pasture and let them run around?"

He wasn't happy about it, but there was no arguing with his dad. "Great. I'm a stupid dog-sitter." After his dad left, he tried to hang around the barn to help find out what happened, but Nick shooed him way. Frustrated, he called the dogs. "C'mon Katie. C'mon Bo. Let's hit the back forty."

The dogs understood 'the back forty', but were reluctant to go. Simon finally had to get their leashes and practically drag them away. Once out in the pasture, the dogs started running around, chasing cattle and each other, but never going far from Simon. He sat down under a large tree and let his mind wander over the past hour's events. And then it hit him, "None of this would have happened if I hadn't taken him to meet Jimmy. Oh my God...what if he dies?"

Bo had run up to him with a branch in his mouth and dropped it at Simon's feet. He could feel the boy's stress and whimpered. Simon looked at the dog with tears in his eyes. "What am I gonna do Bo? Am I gonna go to jail?"

Bo pawed at his leg and then lay down beside Simon. Katie came over and flopped across Simon's stomach with her head on his chest. "My two best friends," he said and let the tears fall freely.

* * *

After hours of waiting for reports on Jeff and Bogg and not getting the information she wanted, Tracy had reached critical mass. "I want answers, and I want them now!" she shouted at the nurse on duty. "My friends were almost killed today and I'm tired of getting the run around from you people! I want to know their exact condition, and why in heaven's name I can't go see them!" 

"If you'd stop abusing the staff, my dear, I'd give you the answers you are looking for," Doc Bailey said as he rounded the corner. "Come sit down and I'll fill you in."

He led them to the couches and gave them a rundown of Jeff and Phineas' condition. They were both suffering from smoke inhalation, and Phineas had a concussion, but he was more concerned with Jeff. His windpipe wasn't crushed by the hanging, but there was mild damage; then there was the mix of drugs in his system. Tracy and the others couldn't believe what they were hearing, even though he was as gentle as he could be when he broke that news to them.

"When can I see them?" Tracy stood up as if to head to their rooms right away. "I need to be with them."

"I'll take you to their rooms my dear, but you _can't_ stay. I can give you a couple minutes with each of them, and then you need to let them rest."

As much as she wanted to argue, she recognized Doc's look- he'd brook no argument from her. He led her into the ward and took her to see Phineas first. She walked to his bedside and gently caressed his cheek. Doc's phone rang and he stepped out to answer it.

Tracy held Bogg's hand and prayed as never before; her fear of losing him scared her deeply.

Doc walked back in, "I'll take you to see Jeff now."

She slowly pulled herself away from Phineas and followed Doc to Jeff's room. He looked pale and haggard, which concerned her a lot. "Are you sure he's OK?" she asked as she softly swept his hair off his forehead and took his hand.

Doc nodded and smiled, "He's young and will bounce back. Right now we're letting the drugs run their course. The next few days may be rough, but I think he'll recover just fine. And now," he took Tracy by the hand and led her back to the waiting room, "I need you to go home and get some sleep."

"Oh, no," she said, entering the waiting room. "I'm not going anywhere."

Doc sighed, not wanting to fight the feisty young woman. "OK, then. Suit yourself. Can I at least get you some coffee?"

"That would be wonderful, thanks."

Doc grabbed three cups of coffee and slipped something extra into Tracy's cup. "She may hate me in the morning, but she needs to be rested." He gave them their coffee and went back to check on Phineas again.

Having finished her coffee, Tracy sat on the couch and yawned. _I can sleep right here if necessary, _she thought. _No one's making me go home until I know..._ she yawned again, much longer this time and rubbed her eyes. Things were starting to get blurry, and her limbs felt heavy.

Doc Bailey came in and nodded to Kirk. "You'd best get her up and moving before you have to carry her out."

"I'm not... leaving."

Doc just smiled. "Get her home and into bed, boys. There's nothing any of you can do for them right now, so please, all of you get some sleep."

The brothers held her between them as they led her out to the truck. "You ...drugged my coffee... Stop... they need me..."

Matt gently scooped her into the cab of the truck and got in beside her. "Matt... don't..." Then she was out cold.

* * *

_Sunday, October 19, 1997_

The following morning Tracy was furious. "Where are those spineless bastards? Matthew! Kirk! Don't try and hide from me!"

She was intercepted by Ray and Tom, who filled her in on the investigation. She paced the floor like an angry cat as they told her that the Sheriff had found a used syringe and a partially smoked joint on the floor. She was numb, not wanting to believe Jeff was using hard drugs. But when they told her Jimmy was out on bail and his prints were on the syringe, she snapped.

"What do you mean, Jimmy was out on bail?" She yelled. "Have they found him, questioned him? What is going on here?" Just then, Kirk, Matt and Doc Bailey walked into the room, and she unleashed her fury on them. "You!" She pointed to Doc Bailey, "You drugged me and sent me home! And you two," she pointed to Kirk and Matt, "you helped him!" The brothers looked at each other nervously, then at Tracy.

But she was done with them and had turned her fury back to the doctor. "What if Jeff woke up, alone and scared? You're gonna let some nurse tell him he's OK?" She paced around the room yelling and Doc just stood there listening, which made Tracy even madder. "Just who the hell do you think you are, drugging me and sending me home? What are they going to think when they wake up and I'm not there? What kind of Doctor are you?"

"The kind that puts the best interest of his patients first," Doc said firmly. "One who cares for his friends so much he left his wife on their forty-fifth wedding anniversary to spend most of the night at the hospital caring for your friends, knowing no one else would give them the care and attention I would."

Tracy was stunned. "Your... your forty-fifth...?" She felt a pit in her stomach and just wanted to die right there on the spot. "Doc, I had no idea..."

He walked over to her, giving her a quick hug, "That was my wife that called when I took you into Phineas' room. We've just postponed our plans, that's all. You should know me well enough to know I would never leave patients in serious condition with just anyone. You also know that when I give an order, I expect it to be followed to the letter. Those two over there," he pointed to the brothers, "were just following my orders. So, if you wanna yell at anyone, yell at me for that, too." Tracy looked at him and nodded slowly, the wind taken completely from her sails. "Now," Doc continued, "if you would like to get an update on the boys..."

An hour later, Tom drove Tracy back to the hospital. She stared out the window, trying to process all the information she'd been given about the previous day and sighed. "What in God's name happened yesterday, Tom? What's going on?"

"I wish I knew, Miss Tracy, I wish I knew."

* * *

That same morning, Jimmy was having a crisis of his own. "Make it stop! Please! I'll do anything, just make them go away!" He ran his hands down his arms again to remove the ants he thought he saw crawling on him. 

"Oh, no. That would be too easy. What you need is a shot of Heroin with your LSD. Hold him down"

"NO! Please, No!" Jimmy screamed. "I'm sorry! I won't fail you again! No, no! Stop!" Jimmy struggled against his captors to no avail. They held firm as the needle entered his arm. "Please," he heaved in ragged breaths, "please give me one more chance! I'll prove myself, my loyalty to the Crew! Just give me one more chance."

"Oh, I'll give you one more chance," said his boss. "My friend Manny here is gonna show you how to prove yourself," he said as Manny dragged Jimmy over to the open window.

Jimmy's eyes widened as he looked down from the fourth floor apartment window. The new drug was taking effect and he could hardly see straight. "I gotta prove myself..." He slid one leg over the edge, then the other.

"Fly away, Jimmy," said a menacing voice behind him. "Fly away and pick up that heroin delivery you missed yesterday because you had to settle a score on your own. Go get it and prove your loyalty."

Jimmy leaned forward and flapped his arms to fly. Ten seconds later, upon hearing a loud noise, the landlord looked out his bedroom window and hollered, "Good God! Susan! Call 911!"

Within minutes a small crowd gathered at the spot where Jimmy had landed. No one noticed three men leave the building. As the police drove up, the men crossed the street and got into their car. The Boss glanced back at the scene behind them and said, "OK, Jimmy, you proved your loyalty. Problem is, the Crew don't give second chances." The three men laughed heartily as they drove away.

* * *

**A/N:**

_This chapter has had a MAJOR revision. For past readers, you may remember when Tracy was at the hospital trying to see the boys, Doc told her no, drugged her and sent her home. I re-read that and thought, "Why can't she go see them, even briefly?" So, that's what I did. And I like it... a lot. :) I hope you all agree._


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

_Sunday, October 19, mid morning_

After Doc, Tracy and Tom left for the hospital again, Simon came up from the bunkhouse. He saw his uncle in the kitchen and sat down at the table, looking very serious.

"Hey kiddo. What's up?"

Simon shrugged, "I dunno, it's just... well, I was just wondering."

"About what?"

"About Jeff, and, you know, what happened yesterday. How did Jeff get tangled up in that net? How did the fire start? How did Bogg hit his head?" The questions just started pouring out and there seemed to be no end in sight. "Yesterday I heard the Sheriff say that Jimmy was released from jail on Friday, and they think that he might have had something to do with this. What if he was the one who started the fire? I'm the one who got Jeff hooked on pot! What if they come after me for--" He stopped suddenly, "Are they gonna arrest me, Uncle Matt?"

"Why would they arrest you? We don't even know for sure what happened in there yesterday, Simon. You can't blame yourself for this." He sat down next to Simon.

"Why not!" he shot back. "If it wasn't for me, Jimmy never would've come after Jeff!" He was trying hard not to cry, but the possibility that his desire to help his friend may have nearly cost his life was more than he could bear. "What's gonna happen to me, Uncle Matt? What happens if Jeff... if he..."

Matt put a reassuring arm around Simon's shoulders. "Jeff's not going to die, Simon! Doc said that he was gonna be all right! Simon, Simon look at me," Matt gently shook his nephew. "Look at me! He's going to be fine, and so is Phineas. It may take some time, but everything is gonna be fine, kiddo, you'll see."

Then an idea struck him. He got up from the table and called out, "Hey, Kirk! Where ya at? Kirk!" Matt went out to the front porch and hollered for his brother, followed by his nephew.

"Keep your shirt on, little brother, I'm right here," Kirk called from the side of the house. "What's all the fuss about Pipsqueak?"

Kirk was 3 inches shorter than his younger brother, yet he always called him Pipsqueak. Matt got behind him and wrapped his arms around him in a bear hug, "Look Simon! I caught me the Jolly Green Giant!" Simon smiled at his dad and uncle and laughed; he was still waiting for the story of how Kirk got that nickname. They were now boxing with each other, then Matt stopped, "Whaddya say the three of us head over to Watson's for a bite to eat?" He lowered his voice to a stage whisper which Simon could obviously hear, "I think Simon could use some cheering up."

The teen glanced away from them, ashamed and embarassed, yet pleased at the attention. He was feeling ganged up on, but at the same time, very loved.

Kirk smiled, "Watson's, eh? I think we might be able to swing that. How about it, son? Ya up for a Root Beer Float?"

Watson's Root Beer Floats always meant a good long talk with his dad and uncle. Simon grinned at his dad, "I'm really depressed... can I have two?"

Kirk winked at his brother, "It'll cost ya... nah, this one's on me."

"You can even drive," Matt chimed in.

Simon's joy turned to sorrow, "But dad took away my permit..."

Matt gave his brother a 'please trust me' look and waited for his answer. Kirk wasn't entirely sure what was going on, but decided to trust his brother, and was impressed with his son's honesty. "All right, Just this once."

Simon let out a loud whoop and ran into the house for the keys then charged back outside and to the truck. Matt walked slowly to the truck and filled Kirk in on Simon's fears and why they were headed to Watson's.

"Good job, Pipsqueak. You'll make a good dad someday."

"Anything for my nephew, Mr. Giant."

* * *

_Sunday October 19th, Noon_

Tracy and Tom were going over yesterday's events at lunch in the hospital cafeteria. Neither could come up with any other explanation but one. "Jimmy," Tom said firmly. "It had to be him, Miss Tracy. Sheriff Hayes said he was out on bail--"

Just then, the Sheriff rounded the corner. "Miss Tracy, Tom," he touched the brim of his hat and nodded to them. "Nurse Kelly said I could find you down here."

Tom stood, "Have a seat, Sheriff." Sheriff Hayes sat down tiredly and removed his hat.

"What's up," Tracy asked anxiously. "Any new leads on yesterday?"

Hayes sighed and ran his hand over his face, "Well, I wanted to let you know that Jimmy Clarkson is dead. He jumped from his fourth floor window a little over an hour ago."

Tracy looked at him in shock as he continued. "Coroner's gonna do an autopsy, but from the looks of his arms, the kid was pretty loaded. We searched his apartment and found a sketch of your barn and some scribbled notes, too. It appears he'd planned it all out. Funny thing is, it looks like he was going after Simon, not Jeff."

Tracy was stunned, "After Simon? So, what actually happened then?"

"According to his notes, his original plan was to overdose Simon then burn down the barn. Our best guess at this point is that Jeff surprised him yesterday, so he got Jeff to smoke and shoot up, and tried to hang him in the loft. Then Mr. Bogg must have shown up. You said the fire started after Mr. Bogg went into the barn?" Tracy nodded as he continued, "Well, as near as we can figure Jimmy could have knocked your friend out and then went ahead with his plan to burn down your barn. Unless Mr. Bogg can remember what happened, we'll never know for sure."

Tracy sighed heavily. The stress of the past 24 hours was starting to wear on her and she couldn't hold back the tears any longer. Tom pulled her to him as she cried.

"It's probably better this way, Miss Tracy," Hayes said. Tracy sat up and nodded, wiping her eyes. Sheriff Hayes put his hat back on and stood to go. "If there's anything else you need, don't hesitate to call. And if Mr. Bogg does remember anything that would help us put this whole thing together, let me know."

"Thank you, Sheriff," she whispered. "Thank you for everything."

* * *

_Monday, October 20th_

Two days after the fire, Tracy sat with Phineas and filled him in on what little they did know about Saturday's fire. She told him of Jimmy's apparent involvement and tried to help him reconstruct the events of the fire. His memory was fuzzy at best and he was very frustrated he couldn't remember what happened.

After visiting with Phineas, Tracy stopped by Jeff's room. When he was a wake, he was sullen and moody; what he wanted more than anything was a hit. Tracy tried to get him to talk about what happened, but he refused. From his reaction to information about Bogg's injuries, it didn't take a psychic to see he was still angry with him. He was glad Bogg was OK, but didn't want to talk to or about him.

Phineas tried to see him that night and snuck into Jeff's room. He couldn't remember feeling as helpless as he did just then. "What happened that night," he whispered. "What did I do to you?" He sat by the bedside for a minute watching Jeff sleep, overcome with guilt. "How can I make it up to you? I'm so sorry, Jeff."

The nurse came in just then, "You shouldn't be out of bed, Mr. Bogg," she scolded as she led him back to his room.

As the door closed behind them, Jeff let out a sigh of relief, tears of frustration falling unbidden.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

_Tuesday, October 21st_

Tracy was visiting with Jeff Tuesday morning when Kirk stopped in. "Ms. Tracy.. hey kiddo!" he waved at Jeff who waved back. "You're lookin' good! A few more days and you'll be back home where you belong!" Jeff smiled and Kirk continued, looking at Tracy. "Doc Bailey said he needed to talk to you. Can I borrow this pretty lady for a minute, Jeff?" He nodded as Tracy followed Kirk out of the room.

"Looks like you two were having a conversation in there. What's goin' on?"

Tracy laughed, "I don't know, but I'm going with it. I'm lucky he's even trying to talk to me at all, considering the last time we talked was Saturday afternoon before the fire, and he wanted nothing to do with me then. But I guess I'm not really the 'bad guy', as far as he's concerned. That honor goes to Phineas. For whatever reason, we have an uneasy trust going on, and I'll take whatever I can get at this point." Kirk nodded in agreement, remembering when he had to rebuild his trust with Simon. "So, what's up?"

"Well, you've got the green light to take Phin home, and boy, is he ready to leave!"

Tracy had to smile at Kirk's choice of words; she couldn't imagine how this whole situation could possibly be a 'green light'. "Will you stay with Jeff --"

"Of course I will, Miss Tracy. I'm almost hurt you'd even have to ask!" They walked back into the room and Tracy grabbed her purse. "Doc Bailey's given this pretty lady an errand to run, so I'm gonna sit and visit with ya, if that's OK by you," Kirk said as he sat on Jeff's bed. Jeff nodded and waved, then grabbed his pen and paper and started writing furiously.

"Watch out Kirk," Tracy cautioned, "he can still talk you in circles without ever using his voice!"

* * *

Phineas was quite for most of the twenty-minute drive home. Tracy wanted desperately to talk to him, but decided to wait until later that evening. It was a good thing she did, because as they pulled up to the house, everyone had come out to welcome them home. Phineas smiled self-consciously, embarrassed by all the hoopla and they all laughed as he got blindsided by Bo and Katie. She noticed that he was loosening up a little, but that changed the moment he caught sight of the barn. She saw a dark cloud cross his face, and thought for sure she could feel the temperature drop. He clenched his jaw and looked away, then hurried through the group and into the house.

No one saw much of Bogg the rest of the day; the only time he even opened his bedroom door was to let Katie in, and that was after she sat and pawed at the door for ten minutes, whining.

When suppertime arrived, Bogg's place at the table was empty. After the meal, Tracy went and knocked on his door. "Phineas?"

"It's open."

She stepped in and closed the door behind her. Katie jumped off the bed and nuzzled her hand, then jumped back on the bed to be next to Bogg. He sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor.

"Phineas--"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Talk about what, sweetie? I came in to see why you didn't come to supper." She didn't usually lie well, and hoped that he believed her.

"I'm not hungry. I don't wanna eat," he said gruffly.

Tracy sighed and sat down on the corner of the bed. "Well, all right then. But you must promise me you'll eat breakfast in the morning, OK? I don't need Doc Bailey yelling at me for not taking care of you." Phineas grinned slightly at that, and Tracy smiled back.

"I promise," he said as he lay down. They sat there in silence for a few minutes, then Tracy stood to go.

"Well, I've got some things to do still before I turn in for the night. Just holler if you need me, OK?" She bent down and kissed his forehead, then turned to go. Hoping against hope that he would open up, she walked slowly to the door. She glanced back at him one last time, "Good night, Phineas," she said as she closed the door.

Katie crawled up to him, put her head on his chest and whined softly. He absently rubbed her head and tried once again to remember exactly what had happened that day. "We fought... he ran to the barn. I followed him..." he rubbed his temples to help draw out the memory. "My head hurt... there was smoke..."

_Wednesday, October 23rd_

Bogg did come to breakfast the next morning as promised, but went back into his room as soon as he was done, Katie hot on his heels. He didn't appear at lunchtime, so after everyone was done, Tracy started to make her way down the hall to his room once more, but was stopped by Ray.

"Don't you need to be headin' for the hospital to visit Jeff?" Ray looked at her sternly as he stepped around her and knocked on Phineas' door. "Hey, Phin, it's Ray. Can I come in?"

Tracy watched as he entered the room and smiled, grabbed her purse and keys off the couch and went to go see Jeff.

He was awake and waiting for her when she walked in. "Hi Tracy," he croaked hoarsely.

"Jeff! You've got a voice!" Tracy cried and gave him a hug. "See, I told you that waiting would pay off! Phineas will be so ha..." she stopped mid-gush as the smile faded from Jeff's face.

"Oh, Jeff, I'm... I'm sorry." She squeezed his hand, trying to recover quickly. "I wanna hear your voice again. Tell me how you're feeling?"

He looked at her suspiciously. He wasn't going to fall for any mind games; none of the 'you and Bogg need to talk things through' crap. He was 14 now, not the 12-year-old orphan that was 'rescued' from his bedroom so long ago. "I'm... doing bett..." he swallowed and tried again, "better, thanks. When do I go..." He coughed to clear his throat and tried again, "go home. I miss Bo."

Tracy smiled. "Doc said that you might be able to go home in another couple of days or so, and Bo has been looking for you every day. He sleeps in your bed every night, on your pillow. I've never seen a dog miss someone so much! I think he's as anxious to have you home as you are to be home!"

Jeff smiled at the thought of sleeping in his own bed again with Bo hogging the space. He smiled and remembered when Bo and Katie were pups and they could both sleep on his bed, and then when he and Bogg...

Why did it always come back to Bogg? He wanted so much to blame him for whatever happened, but somewhere deep down inside, he knew he was being unfair. When Nick visited him earlier, he'd said Bogg got hurt trying to save him. Maybe he was being too hard on him, but it was so much easier to blame him!

He decided to briefly swallow his pride. "How's... how's Bogg?"

She stared at him stunned, but pleased at the same time. "Well, he's doing OK, I guess. He doesn't talk much, like someone else I know," she said and poked him gently. "I'm starting to get a little concerned, actually. He won't talk to me at all, especially about last week."

"That's not like him," Jeff replied slowly, his anger turning to concern. If Bogg wouldn't talk to Tracy, then something was really wrong.

"What do you remember about Saturday, Jeff? Anything at this point would help."

He closed his eyes and thought hard, but nothing would solidify that made any sense at all. He tried to picture the barn... He was floating, then he remembered pain, and terror. Something was trying to hurt him! He cried out in panic, "Bogg! Help me!"

Tracy jumped at the sudden outburst. "Jeff! Jeff honey, what's wrong?"

"He didn't come," he said, his voice quavering. "I called for him, and he didn't come! Why did he let me get hurt?"

Tracy held him as he continued to ask why Bogg wasn't there. She rubbed his back and said quietly, "Jeff, honey, he was there." He looked up at her, dark eyes daring her to make him believe.

"After you left, we talked... actually he yelled and I talked. He grabbed his Omni and was ready to disappear, he was so mad. You want to know what I told him?" Jeff nodded, knowing what a 'mad Tracy' looked like and knew Bogg must have gotten an earful, which actually made him smile inside. "I said to him, 'I swear, you're both acting like a couple of 3 year olds! I know you and Jeff had a horrible time with your last assignment and he's being childish, but so are you!' He just held up his Omni, ready to press the button, so I said, 'Phineas Bogg, if you Omni out of here, don't expect to come back in my good graces!' Then I turned around and walked out of the room."

Jeff was smiling, seeing the entire thing in his head. Tracy might be short in stature, but she was a force to be reckoned with regardless of size. He knew she had made a good point, but still needed to defend himself. "I was not acting like a 3 year old," he said quietly. "You guys were badgering me about drugs and how we have to keep history right, and how I needed a counselor to fix me."

"So you ran out in a huff hurling insults. I believe at one point you said to us, 'I don't need help, it's you two.'" She looked him square in the eye, and he held her gaze for a moment before averting his eyes. "I know you were hurting Jeff, but so were we. Believe it or not, we're on your side." She took his hand. "I don't know what happened in there that day, but I can tell you this much: he was there. Phineas was in the barn looking for you."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

_Saturday, October 25th_

Three days later, Jeff came home. It was exactly a week from the day of the accident, and Tracy made sure everyone downplayed that point. Bo was completely beside himself with joy when they drove up with Jeff, and wouldn't leave his side for a moment.

At Kirk's urging, Phineas was out front with the others. He'd hung back, letting them see Jeff first because he wasn't sure how Jeff would respond to him. When Jeff noticed him, the smile froze on his face; his first instinct was to run to Bogg and throw his arms around him in a bear hug, but he also still felt anger and resentment. They stared at each other for a moment, then Bogg broke the silence with, "Hiya, kid. Good to have you back."

Jeff stared at him, not sure of what to say or do. "Thanks," he finally managed. "Good to see you, too."

Kirk nudged Phineas, urging him on, but the moment had passed and Ray was talking to Jeff. Bogg walked back to the house, his heart aching so badly he thought his chest would explode.

As he talked to Ray and watched Bogg leave, Jeff's stomach knotted up and he clenched his fists, trying hard to not cry. That was one thing he'd promised himself during his recovery: he wasn't going to cry anymore. Period. He bent down and hugged Bo to cover his emotions and regain control, then went in the house and holed up in his room.

Simon had watched this all from a distance, still not able to bring himself to talk to Jeff. He watched as Jeff and Bogg interacted, and noticed something peculiar: their body language was cold but their eyes... Kirk walked up with Matt and brought Simon out of his reverie. "Hey son, aren't you going to say hi to Jeff?" He looked away and shook his head.

Matt knelt down and put a hand on his nephew's shoulder. "Talk to me, kiddo."

"Why didn't they talk to each other more? Is Jeff still mad at Phin, or the other way around?" The adults glanced at each other as the teen continued. "Jeff and Phineas look kinda like we did this last spring, Dad. Remember how Miss Tracy said our words meant nothing cuz 'the truth was in our eyes'? I wanted to talk to you, but was too mad or afraid... I just saw _me _in Jeff just now, and I'd bet a week's allowance that Phineas is feelin' just like you and Uncle Matt did..."

Kirk shook his head in amazement. "When'd this kid get t'be so smart, Pipsqueak?"

"Beats me," Matt laughed, "But it's my guess there's somethin' brewin' in that blonde head of his." The brothers looked at Simon and he grinned.

"Actually, I _was_ kinda thinkin'... You two could grab Phin and I guess I'll try to talk to Jeff, and..." he laid out his plan as they headed out to the corral.

* * *

_Sunday, October 26th_

The next day, Kirk and Matt went into Phineas' room and announced that they needed his help with some horses and they wouldn't take no for an answer. Bogg put up a brief argument, but relented quickly. Katie was overjoyed to finally be out and about and ran so many circles around the three men that they all got dizzy. At one point, she even tripped Phineas and he fell in a heap and laughed.

"It's good to see ya laugh again, Phin," Kirk said as he pulled him up and they headed to the pasture. The plan was to turn the conversation to how Kirk had dealt with Simon and his drug use and offer help and advice to Phineas, and to get him to open up. Matt had decided to play referee if necessary.

Tracy meanwhile, had decided Jeff was not going to mope around inside like Phineas had for the past four days. "You know, Jeff, it's a really beautiful day. Why don't you take Bo outside? He'd enjoy running around, and Doc Bailey said the sunshine'll do ya good." Bo thumped his tail on the bed and looked hopefully at Jeff.

"Where's Bogg?"

Tracy shrugged, "I don't know. He's out from under my feet and it's a relief, let me tell ya!" She grinned and winked at him. "Go on, get outta this room and into the sun or I'll..."

"I'm going, I'm going!" He smiled as he got off the bed.

Five minutes later, Jeff was outside on the porch with a tennis ball in his hand, watching Bo run around like a mad thing. He'd race from one end of the yard to the other, skid to a stop in front of the porch and bark at Jeff sharply, then take off running again. For a while, Jeff just stood there squeezing the ball, watching the possessed animal make dust clouds like a Tasmanian devil. Eventually, Bo's exuberance got the better of him, and Jeff and threw the ball as hard as he could.

'_You can do this_,' Simon thought as he rounded the corner of the house. The last time he'd talked to Jeff was just before Jeff and Bogg were trapped in the barn, and that conversation hadn't gone so well. He took a deep breath, "Hey Jeff."

"Hey."

They eyed each other, saying nothing. Simon went and sat on the porch swing and Jeff continued to throw the ball for Bo.

Simon tried again, "So, how ya feeling?"

"OK, I guess." Jeff shrugged and glanced away as Bo came running up with the ball in his mouth.

"You heard about what happened to Jimmy, didn't you?"

Jeff looked back at Simon. "Yeah, I did. I don't wanna talk about it."

Simon had expected to fight with Jeff, and braced himself. "You can't ignore it, Jeff. You've gotta-"

"Don't start with me, man!"

"I'm not starting anything, _man_," Simon shot back. "You're the one with the chip on his shoulder, not me. I just came over to talk to my good friend, that's all. But ya know what? Forget it. You just keep throwing that ball for your dumb dog. I'm outta here." Simon took off down the steps and headed toward the corral.

He tried to stay quiet, but Jeff's anger got the better of him. Bo dropped the ball again and Jeff heaved it as hard as he could, yelling after Simon, "What do you want from me, huh? You're the reason all this happened in the first place!"

Simon froze mid-stride and slowly turned around. "I'm sorry, OK? I'm sorry for trying to help you, and I'm sorry for caring! I made a mistake that I wish I could take back, but I can't. You almost died last week because of me..."

"Tell me something I don't know!"

" 'Tell me something I don't know'," Simon mimicked as he came back to the porch. "Fine! What you don't know is what's it's been like for me this past week. You don't know that when you got hurt, I was scared to death that I was gonna get arrested because I got you hooked on pot! What you don't know is the hell we've been through trying to cope with all this! Do you think you're the only one who got hurt?"

"Leave Bogg outta this!" Jeff shouted.

"**Bogg**? Who's talking about Bogg?" Simon shouted back. "And what's your problem with him anyways? It's not like any of this is his fault; have you ever thought about **his** feelings, Jeff? Or are you just too wrapped up in your own problems to not notice anyone else's pain?"

Jeff glared angrily at him, clenching his fists and breathing hard. He tried to push past Simon get to the front door, "Move!" Jeff snarled. He tried to shove him out of the way, but Simon was slightly bigger, and definitely stronger.

"No."

"Fine!" Jeff spun around and headed down the stairs and toward the barn.

"You can't get into the barn this time. It's locked."

He stopped and turned to face Simon, eyes blazing. "Whaddaya think I'm gonna go do, hang myself? Jeeze Simon, just leave--"

Simon paled as images of Jeff hanging in the loft assaulted him. He grabbed onto the railing to support himself. Jeff briefly continued his verbal assault until he realized Simon was white as a sheet and shaking. "Simon? Are you OK? You look like you're gonna pass out!" He ran back up the steps, his anger forgotten, "Hey, are you all right? Simon, what's wrong? I'm gonna get your dad..."

"No... no, I'm good, really." He sat on the swing and Jeff watched him, unsure of what to do."Why'd you have to say that, Jeff?"

"Say what? You mean the hanging thing? C'mon Simon, I was just blowing off steam."

"Don't you know how we found you last week?"

Jeff shook his head, "I never asked, so no one offered that information. Are you telling me that I tried to hang myself?" He was no longer angry, but keenly interested in what Simon had to say.

"You were tangled up in some cargo netting in the loft. We think Jimmy tied a rope through the netting around your neck and attached it to one of the pulleys we'd had the new support beams on. Once Bo found you, Tracy climbed up and told Nick to pull the beams outta the way so she could get to you, but instead of pulling beams up..."

"He pulled me up and I was..." Jeff looked stunned and his hand went to his throat, eyes wide.

Simon nodded, eyes filled with tears he couldn't stop. "Jimmy tried to kill you because of me! When we got caught and Jimmy ended up in jail, did you know he was actually planning this for me? You just happened to be there at the 'right time', so he took you instead!" He buried his head in his hands. "God, why was I so stupid? Why didn't I figure this out when dad caught me using?"

"You were just trying to help me, I guess," Jeff replied weakly.

Simon went on as if Jeff wasn't there, "I thought it would be safe to do pot just once. I thought I was strong enough for both of us this time, but I was wrong.Why did I go back?"

"It's not like you knew any of this would happen."

"But I should have known I couldn't do it on my own!"

"Do what on your own?" Jeff was now genuinely confused.

"When my mom left us, my dad was all depressed and not talkin' to me much, and I met Jimmy. I figured I was strong enough to not get addicted to pot; it was just an escape, you know? I'd been seriously using since November and I finally got caught in April and lost my one means of escape," Jeff nodded, knowing exactly how that felt. "And once I was off pot I had to deal with the reality that my mom was really gone and it was just me and my dad. It hurt so bad, Jeff, and I wouldn't talk to anyone. Then one night I couldn't cope anymore and my dad found me curled up in the corner of my room holding Bo and crying like a baby."

"So, you were using the last time Bogg and I were here?"

Simon nodded sadly. "I got caught a couple of days after you guys left. It was hell Jeff. I hated the world and I hated my dad. It wasn't until that night he found me crying that things started getting a little better. I told him how I felt, and I found out that I wasn't the only one hurting. You gotta talk to someone, Jeff, anyone."

Right there, out on the porch, Simon had backed Jeff into a corner he couldn't get out of. There was nothing Jeff could say to him that wouldn't sound childish, self-centered, or just plain stupid, and he knew it. With a heavy sigh, he sat down next to Simon on the porch swing and started to talk.

A few hours later Kirk, Phineas and Matt came back from the pasture, leading a pregnant mare. Kirk went to get Tracy as Matt continued talking to Bogg. "He won't open up right away," Matt said, stoking the mare's nose. "Just remember, this is going to take some time."

Bogg nodded in agreement, "Yeah, time. Like I don't have enough of that already." Matt looked at him quizzically as Bogg headed into the house.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

_Sunday Evening, October 26th_

Later that night, Tracy went out to the barn to check on the pregnant mare. Hoping to meet up with Kirk to discuss the next steps of transferring ownership of the ranch, (and hopefully end her assignment), she was surprised to walk in on the Boyds having a meeting of their own. "What are the three of you doing in here?"

They looked at each other guiltily, then Simon filled her in on their plan to get Phineas and Jeff talking again. Tracy smiled, "You three have got to be the best friends those two have ever had. Count me in on this little pow-wow." Simon continued telling them about his talk with Jeff that afternoon and what he'd learned. Then Kirk and Matt talked about their time with Phineas. She listened quietly, taking it all in.

"One thing is very clear," she told them when they finished. "The two of them want desperately to talk to each other, but they're either too stubborn or too afraid to start."

"Stubborn," the family replied in unison, then laughed.

"Well, at least we now know more of what the problem is. So how do we get them talking again? Any suggestions?"

The mare stamped her foot on the stall floor and whinnied, startling the group. "What's wrong, Fantasy? Is it time?" She paced the floor and then lay down on the ground. Then her water broke. "Looks like our discussion will have to wait. I think we have a baby on its way."

* * *

Jeff wandered out of his room with his dinner dishes and bumped into Bogg who was on his way back from the kitchen. He stepped aside to let Bogg pass, then went on into the kitchen without a second look. Bogg stood in the hallway for a moment, then went and sat down on the couch. When Jeff came back down the hall, he noticed that Bogg had both Katie and Bo and was scratching their bellies at the same time.

"C'mere Bo," Jeff called. The dog flipped over instantly but looked at Bogg as if asking permission to leave. He looked at Jeff and thumped his tail on the hardwood floor, a pleading look in his eyes. Bo had learned that if he really wanted to get his way, to use that look. It worked on humans almost every time.

Jeff sighed, aggravated, and sat down on the love seat across from Bogg. Bo ran over and licked Jeff's hand then ran back and rolled on his back for some more tummy rubs. Jeff had to smile in spite of himself, and so did Bogg.

Katie rolled over, ran to Jeff and jumped on his lap, flipping onto her back again. Being a Golden Retriever, she was not a lap dog by any stretch, and the sight of her sprawled across Jeff made Bogg chuckle. "Looks like she misses you."

Jeff laughed at the absurdity of it all, "Yeah, but she's gonna crush me in her joy!" He struggled to get out from under Katie, but she was adamant. Jeff was going to stay put and rub her tummy and that was that.

Not to be outdone, Bo leaped into Bogg's lap and started licking his face. "Bo! Knock it off!" Bogg cried as he tried to avoid the sloppy kisses.

"Bo, Down! Katie, get off of me!" Jeff laughed. Satisfied that their work was done, the dogs jumped down and darted out the back door for a lively game of chase.

With the dogs gone, silence reigned. Bogg knew he should say something, but what? Jeff watched him intently, trying to decide what to do. They started to talk at the same time, then had to laugh. Jeff held out his hand to Bogg, "You first."

"No, you first."

"Age before beauty!"

"Cute kid, real cute!"

"I'm not a kid anymore, Bogg," Jeff said, suddenly serious. "I'm fourteen. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't call me Kid all the time."

They lapsed into silence once more; the only sound was the dogs barking at each other. Jeff played with a tassel on one of the pillows and Bogg stared at the floor. "Look, I'm no good at this parenting thing, and--"

"You don't have to be, Bogg," Jeff cut in, exasperated. "Newsflash... **you're not my dad**. My dad died in 1982 in a car wreck, just like Princess Diana did. It was _obviously_ a green light just like hers was, so we can't change it. We're Voyagers; we have to keep history on track. Even if it ruins your life." He got up to go, but this time Bogg stood his ground.

"Sit down, Jeff." He continued to walk away. "**I said sit down, Jeffrey**."

He froze, then turned slowly around and faced Bogg. The authority in his voice had surprised both of them, but Phineas had thrown down the gauntlet and Jeff accepted the challenge. He walked slowly back to the love seat and sat down, never taking his eyes off of Bogg.

He looked at Jeff with troubled blue eyes and sighed heavily, softening his tone a bit. "I don't **want** to be your dad, kid. I want to be your friend, someone you can talk to; more like an uncle, I guess. I've tried my best over the past 2 years to take care of you, and I ..."

Jeff stood up and started to pace. "But you don't have to 'take care of me' all the time! It's not like I'm a 5 yr old little kid! I know I don't know everything, but give me _some_ credit, OK? Why do you have to smother me so much? I just want my space, is that too much to ask?"

"I smother you?" Phineas looked genuinely surprised.

"Yeah, you do. I can do things on my own, without you there to protect me. Remember when we got separated that one time--"

"**One** time?"

"Yeah, whatever," Jeff waved his hand in the air. "Anyway, When I ended up with Thomas Edison? Sure, I was scared at first, but I was fine. I can take care of myself."

"Like you did last week?"

"That's not fair!"

"No, it wasn't fair Jeff. We were trying to have a discussion with you, **_as an adult_**, and what did you do? You called us names and stormed out. Real mature kid, real mature."

"Yeah? Well I went out to the barn to escape your nagging and I found-" Jeff suddenly stopped short, surprising himself with the memory. Phineas watched him closely, afraid to say anything.

He continued slowly, "I found a joint. And I," he looked at Bogg, suddenly ashamed. "God, it was **_so_** good!" He was pacing, allowing the memory to unfold. "And then... it started... he was... um, he, or it..." he closed his eyes, trying to bring the memory into focus. He opened his eyes and started to tremble.

"What did he do, Jeff," Phineas whispered as he stood and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "What happened? What did Jimmy do to you?"

Disjointed images swirled in his head as he again flashed back to that day. Tears fell as he looked up at Bogg, eyes wide with fear. "It hurts. Stop, please! No, don't!"

"It's OK, Jeff!"

Phineas grabbed him by the arms and Jeff started to fight him, "Help, please...Bogg!"

Jeff was stronger than Phineas had expected and he struggled to hold him. "I'm right here Jeff, its OK!" Phineas shouted over Jeff's rising panic, trying to get through to him. "Jeff! It's OK! Jeffrey! Jeff look at me, LOOK AT ME!"

* * *

Simon was talking a mile a minute, "That was so cool! I've never seen a mare foal before! Wow! Is it always that easy? She just lay down and then, Bam! Baby! OK maybe not that fast, but still. That was amazing! She didn't even need us! Wow. I want to learn more about this. Do you think I could be a Vet? Or maybe a Trainer? Hey, I've gotta tell Jeff about this! He'll be sorry he missed out. Can I watch the next time, Miss Tracy? I know Crystal's due soon!"

They laughed as the questions continued, until Kirk finally clamped his hand over his son's mouth. "If you don't give us a chance to answer, you'll never know, will ya son?" Bo and Katie had run over and were running in circles around the group barking happily. Suddenly, Bo stopped and looked to the house, his ears pricked high.

"What is it, boy?" Tracy asked him. He whined as the sound of Jeff shouting floated out to them. Bo and Katie started to run for the house, but Tracy yelled, "Heel!" Both dogs stopped and came to her side. "Hold them," she said to Matt and Kirk as they all headed quickly to the house.

"He sounds terrified," Matt said as they got to the porch.

Then they heard Phineas, "Jeff, look at me, LOOK AT ME!"

Tracy started in, but Kirk held her back, "It sounds like Jeff's having a flashback. Let them work it out on their own. This is exactly what they need, isn't it son?" Simon nodded and Tracy stared helplessly at the door, wanting nothing more than to go in and help them. But Kirk was right. If things were ever going to get better, they had to work things out themselves.

They heard Phineas saying, "It's gonna be OK Jeff, I promise. I want to help you, but I can't if you won't talk to me. Please kid...Jeff..." the group stood there a moment, trying not to eavesdrop but desperately curious at the same time. Then Matt spoke up, "Maybe we could go get some dessert over at Watson's?"

"Good idea, Pipsqueak," Kirk replied. "I think we need to celebrate on behalf of Fantasy's little filly. And it's my treat." Tracy allowed herself to be led to Matt's truck hoping against hope that things were finally looking up for Phineas and Jeff.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

_Still Sunday Evening, October 26th_

"It's gonna be OK Jeff, I promise," Phineas said soothingly, holding Jeff as he flashed back to that night, hallucinations vividly returning to taunt him. "I want to help you, but I can't if you won't talk to me. Please kid...Jeff..." He peeled Jeff off of him and held onto his shoulders. "How can I be a good partner if I can't help you?"

Jeff tried desperately to calm his breathing as he gripped his friends arm. "Oh my God, make it stop! It's not real, it's not real," he repeated over and over through gritted teeth. It took a few minutes, but the terror finally passed and Jeff relaxed under Bogg's grip.

"Do you want to talk about it," Bogg asked as they sat down on the couch.

"No."

They sat there in silence, each wanting the other to say something. It was Bogg who finally spoke.

"I got shanghaied by Matt and Kirk this afternoon; they told me we were just checking on the horses. Turns out they had other plans; they decided I needed to talk about last week whether I wanted to or not." He smiled ruefully at Jeff. "They said I was 'worrying Miss Tracy to death' and if I didn't start behaving... well, lets just say you'd be flyin' solo for a while."

"How are you worrying Tracy? I thought you two were OK?"

He rubbed the back of his neck, "Well, not exactly. I guess I've shut her out. I'm afraid to talk to her."

"Afraid? What are you afraid of?"

"I'm afraid of ... of needing her to much. I can't be relying on others all the time. I've gotta learn to cope with things on my own!"

Jeff was shocked. He knew putting feelings into words was not the easiest thing for Bogg to do, and was surprised by the admission.

He looked at Jeff, "When we couldn't cope with our last assignment, what'd I do? I brought us to Tracy. Unless you're with me to tell me what needs to be fixed, I don't know what to do when we Omni in somewhere. I've learned to rely on others and not myself and I can't do that. You're going to eventually go to Academy, and I'll be on my own again with just my wits and a guidebook. I can't rely on someone all the time to tell me what to do!" He sat down opposite Jeff, head in his hands.

Jeff's reply was instant. "Give yourself some credit, Bogg. You'd been doing this for years before we met, and you did a great job. You can't just rely on yourself all the time, you'll burn out." He was surprised at the ease with which the words came forth. He walked slowly across to Bogg and sat next to him.

Phineas pondered that before responding. "Yeah, maybe. And coming here did help us out, until... well..."

Jeff looked down at the floor, "Until I made a choice that almost ended my life." Tears started to well up in his eyes, and he tried desperately to hold them at bay. He took a deep breath, "I'm sorry I turned out to be such a rotten partner."

Bogg shook his head, "You're not a rotten partner, Jeff. I couldn't respect a rotten person." Jeff blushed slightly. "I look at what you've gone through already at your age and I'm just amazed at your maturity, well, usually," he winked at Jeff who just rolled is eyes. "And also how smart you are. You're a walking guidebook and I never would have figured out 95 percent of my assignments if it weren't for you. I want you to know something, kid... and I say 'kid' with respect, OK? I don't mean for it to sound condescending."

"Kinda like when my dad called me 'Sport'?"

He had to think a moment, the reference lost on him. "Um, yeah, I guess so. Anyway, what I want you to know is that, well, since I picked you up in 1982, I ah, what I mean is..."

Jeff watched, bemused by his friends discomfort. If this was any other time and about any other topic, he'd spout off with one of his famous wise-cracks.

"I need you, kid. Not as a guidebook, not just as a friend or a partner either." He stood and paced the floor, frustrated. "I need **_you_**. I know it sounds stupid, and I hope you get what I'm trying to say, but I'm nothing without you."

Jeff was genuinely surprised. Bogg had certainly told him that he was needed, and that he loved him, but this was different. And for the first time since they'd been thrown together, Jeff understood exactly where Phineas was coming from. He opened his mouth to say he felt the same way, but Phineas held up his hand.

"Don't say a word until I get this out. In my own time, I was known as a rapscallion, a good for nothing pirate. That's who I was and I was proud of that. Then I became a Voyager. When I got in the field, I discovered I could make a difference; some might have said I was still a rapscallion, but I wasn't 'good for nothing' anymore. And then I landed in your bedroom." They both smiled at the memory. "You were a pain in my backside, obnoxious and way too mouthy."

Jeff laughed, "Hey! I resemble that remark!"

"Yeah, you did, back then," he chuckled, "But then we learned to trust each other and work _together_. And that's when things really changed for me. I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for you Jeff. You made me a better Voyager, and a better person too. And when I thought you were hurt last week in the fire... God, my head hurt so badly and all I could do was keep pulling on that rope because I thought that would keep you safe!"

"Wait, **you** pulled me up? Simon said that it was Nick, right after Tracy found me... do you remember what happened Bogg?"

Phineas closed his eyes, "I... I don't know... I went into the barn, then I smelled smoke and my head hurt so badly... I knew there was a fire and you were on one of the beams in the loft and I had to pull you to safety. Instead I almost..." It was more than he could bear and he sat on the love-seat across from Jeff, "Oh my God Jeff, I could have killed you," he whispered.

He was at his friends side in an instant. "But you thought you were saving me Bogg! You didn't know that Jimmy put me in that... noose," he paused and swallowed hard. They both looked at each other, the realization of Jimmy's plan coming to them instantaneously. Jeff's voice shook as he continued, "He must have hit you when you came in looking for me, then got you to pull on the rope... you thought you were saving me."

Phineas looked at his young friend, his eyes full of tears. "If anything ever happened to you Jeff, I wouldn't be able to go on being a Voyager. You are the most important thing in my life and if I lost you..."

Jeff had never seen him so upset before, which almost frightened him. He put an arm around Bogg's shoulders and just sat there, lending silent support. As Phineas regained control, Jeff spoke.

"I feel the same way, Bogg. Not that you could tell with the way I've been treating you lately." Phineas nodded, making Jeff smile, "You didn't have to agree so fast, ya know!"

They both chuckled, then Jeff continued, "But seriously, I'm sorry I hurt you. I know Diana's death was just as hard on you, and I'm sorry for the things I said back in England."

Bogg started to reply, but was silenced by Jeff, "I let you talk, now it's my turn. It was so easy to blame you for everything because you were the one with her, and maybe things would have been different if you'd gone instead of Trevor. Maybe they wouldn't have crashed, but what if they still did? You said the Omni was red until you stayed behind; does that mean you would have been injured, or even been killed?"

Phineas saw his own pain and fear of loss mirrored in Jeff's dark eyes. "I thought about it almost every day, Jeff."

"That's what upset me so much; almost more than her death or remembering my parents crash. I knew that **you** could have died that night, too, and it scared the hell outta me. Instead of telling you that, I got mad at you and blamed you for everything. Then we got here, and Simon took me to meet Jimmy... I knew smoking pot was wrong the moment I did it, but just then, I didn't care. I didn't want to have to think about it because it hurt so badly. Forgetting was so much easier than facing that pain! And then you guys made me face it, and well, you know how that ended up."

He got up and walked over to the fireplace. "You said I've made you a better person and a better Voyager; well, you changed who I am by who you are. I don't know of a more honorable, kind, or caring man than you. In fact, I'd like to meet someone from your Time that said you were good for nothing so I could prove them wrong." Phineas had to smile as he listened, amazed at what was taking place.

Jeff looked him in the eyes, "I've got a confession to make. When I got home yesterday and I saw you out there, all I wanted to do was run over and tell you how glad I was that you were OK. But I was still mad at you too, and I let that over-ride my feelings. I'm sorry things had to happen this way, Bogg, I really am."

Phineas went and put his arm around Jeff, "Apology accepted kid... I mean Jeff. Man, that's gonna be a hard habit to break."

Jeff laughed, "Well, just don't use it too often, and I'll be OK with it."

"You sure? 'Cuz I don't want you to think I'm looking down on you."

"Believe me, after today, I won't." He yawned and looked at the clock on the mantle. "Man, I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted. I'm gonna go to bed, if that's OK with you. I mean, unless you want to talk some more... or are we done for tonight?"

"No, kid, we're done for tonight. I don't think I could take anymore crying or talking." They laughed, said their good-nights and went to their rooms. Jeff was asleep the instant he hit the pillow. Phineas' last conscious thought was planning his talk with Tracy the next day, hoping it would go as well as tonight did.

* * *

_Monday, October 27th_

The next morning, Tracy found Phineas sitting on the couch. Her first thought was of night he and Jeff had arrived, and how he broke down, and prepared herself for the worst.

"Hi hon, how ya doin?"

"I'm good," he smiled at her.

_He sounds happy. maybe things aren't so bad... _She thought as she sat down beside him on the couch. "What'cha thinking about?"

"You, me..."

"Really? Would you care to elaborate?"

He took her hands and looked into her eyes, "Well, I wanted to apologize to you."

"Apologize? For what?"

"If you'd let me finish, I'd tell you," he smiled at her again and she pretended to lock her mouth and throw away the key as he laughed, "Oh if it were only that easy!" She swatted him playfully, but kept her mouth closed. " Tracy, I owe you an apology for shutting you out this past week. I realized yesterday while I was out with Kirk and Matt that I was doing to you what Jeff was doing to me, and I just felt horrible. And now that Jeff and I are talking again--"

Tracy's mouth flew open in shock; of course she knew they were talking last night, but the way he said it completely surprised her. It was obvious a heavy burden had been lifted from his shoulders. Phineas laughed at her shocked expression and gently closed her mouth with one finger. "I'm not done yet." She nodded, grinning slightly as he continued, "As I was saying, now that Jeff and I are talking again, I need to make sure you're OK and understand that I never meant to hurt you, or shut you out. I just had to figure this one out on my own because I was afraid--"

She put her hand on his mouth and 'unlocked' her own. "Apology accepted. I do understand what you were going through, and I appreciate your apology." Phineas looked at her quizzically and she smiled.

"Kirk and Matt filled me in on your 'little chat' yesterday; they were worried about me, and us, and wanted to make sure I knew how you felt. You felt responsible for Jeff's injuries, and since he was still ignoring you, you thought closing yourself off would be the best way to cope. You also seem to think you rely on others too much. I don't know why you would think that, but if it helps at all I'll make myself unavailable to you." She laughed at his shocked expression, "But if not, you know you're never a burden and I'll always be here for you, no matter what." She smiled at him and touched his cheek gently, "You are an amazing man, Phineas Bogg. What would I do without you?"

"You'd live a very boring Voyager life, for one thing." They laughed and she drew him close and kissed him. He looked at her and sighed, "I need to tell you what happened last night between me and Jeff. He asked me to tell you so we only have to do it once." Tracy nodded and sat back to hear the tale.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

_Monday, October 27th_

Jeff woke up and headed into the kitchen. _I wish I drank coffee, 'cuz man could I use some! _He passed the living room and saw Bogg sitting on the couch. He was about to make his presence known but then saw Tracy was there too, and they were asleep in each others arms. He smiled and crept by the couch so not to wake them.

After grabbing breakfast, Jeff went out to the bunkhouse to tell Simon what had happened the night before. Simon met him outside and they started walking, "I heard you talked to Bogg last night."

"Yeah... how'd you know?"

"We kinda heard you freaking out..." Jeff ducked his head, embarrassed. Simon put a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, it's cool. You had a flashback, it happens. So how'd it go?"

"It went OK, I guess. I did what you said, and told him that I'm not a kid, I'm 14, and to give me credit for being able to take care of myself. Then I had that flashback; it was horrible. I don't think I've ever been that scared. I guess it scared Bogg pretty badly, too. Once he calmed me down, we really talked about stuff."

Jeff told him what had transpired and Simon smiled. "See? I told you it wouldn't be so bad."

"Yeah, yeah. But I do want to thank you for telling me to talk to him. I'd figured if he wanted to talk, he'd come to me, but I guess he's as stubborn as I am. I wasn't even going to do it last night, but I guess Bo and Katie had other ideas."

Simon smiled, "Leave it to the dogs to set things straight!"

They laughed and Jeff stopped walking, "I just thought of something. Oh man this is weird!"

"What's weird?"

"I was just thinking about everything that's happened here over the past month or so, and it just suddenly hit me. When we went to the old Johnson Barn the first time, we were at a four-way stop, or a crossroad." Simon nodded, remembering, "Bogg and I came to our own crossroad last night and this time, I think we chose the right direction."

Simon smiled, appreciating the analogy. "Wow. That is pretty weird, Jeff." He continued walking, "So what do you want to do today? Nick and Tom are going into town, and Ray is working on his truck..."

"Hey, do you think your dad'll let us play with that new PlayStation of yours? It looks really cool."

"I dunno, I'm still grounded from when we 'took the wrong crossroad'."

"Aw man!"

"Sorry. But I don't think he'll let me. We did screw up pretty badly."

Jeff laughed and gave him a shove. "Oh come on, we might be able to change his mind! That Crash Bandicoot game looks like fun and I really want to play it. And I need you to show me how! So if we double-team him, he can't say no! C'mon!" He started running for the bunkhouse. Simon followed close behind, hoping his dad would let them play.

* * *

_A week and a half later _

"I can't believe this! You stupid Omni! Gah!"

Phineas was furious. He and Jeff had decided to stay another week or so, giving them a little extra time to work things out between them. They were now ready to go, had said their good-byes and were trying to leave while everyone was busy working, but their Omni had other ideas.

"How hard is it, you stupid piece of hardware? It's a Green Light! Let... Us... Go!" He pressed the activator after each word, but nothing happened.

"It seems we're now on 'Long Term Assignment' too, Jeff," Phineas said with a growl. Even though he was more than willing to stay, the fact that he couldn't leave irked him greatly. "Now we've gotta explain why we have to stay..."

"I've got it covered, Phineas, don't worry. They'll all be glad you can stay on for a while. And this way you can help Kirk and Matt start running things on their own again. We're hoping that by this time next month the papers will be finalized and they will be sole owners of this place once again."

Tracy tried to hide how pleased she was that they couldn't leave, but wasn't successful. Having them around made her assignment easier to bear. She couldn't help herself, but hoped, selfishly, that they would be able to stay for the Holidays.

As the weeks progressed, Phineas would work on the Omni then pull Jeff aside and try to leave to no avail. As Thanksgiving approached, Tracy begged them to stay. "What's one more week? Please, Phineas," and she smiled her sweetest smile.

He shook his head and laughed. "How can I resist? Fine. I won't try to leave again until after Thanksgiving."

The beginning of Thanksgiving week, Matt told Phineas about the annual weekend fishing trip the men took. "This is our "Over 18" trip: No kids, no ladies, just two whole days of fishin'." He gave Phineas a knowing wink. "C'mon, whaddaya say?"

Phineas smiled in spite of himself. "Just us and the fish, huh?" Matt's eyes twinkled with mischief. "Sounds great! I haven't gone fishing in ages." As Matt walked off to tell the others, Phineas sighed, "So, what's **two more** days?"

* * *

_Thursday, November 27th_

Tracy was enormously happy to happy to have Jeff and Phineas with her for Thanksgiving and the feast alone proved it. This was the happiest she'd been since their arrival in September, and Ray wasn't the first (or last) person to mention this to him. "Can't ya do yer work closer to home," he asked Bogg during dessert. "Jeff and Simon are like brothers, and then there's you an' Miss Tracy..."

Phineas sighed heavily and men around him laughed.

They left for the river early the next morning in high spirits. Tracy had packed leftovers, to which the group complained loudly. "Fer cryin' out loud Miss Tracy! We're gonna be catching our own food! We don't need anything extra..."

But she would not be gainsaid. Nick grabbed the box of food and shoved it under all the other supplies. "We can't eat it if it's forgotten," he said, winking at Tom who promptly gave him a high five.

"Please dad! We're old enough!"

"C'mon Bogg! I haven't been fishing in years! Please?"

"No means No. Sorry boys." Kirk shoved Phineas into the truck before he could either change his mind or ask if they could come. With horns blaring and whoops of joy, the caravan pulled out, leaving two very disappointed teens in their wake.

* * *

_Saturday, November 29th_

Tracy, Simon and Jeff were out by the corral, watching Fantasy and Crystal romp with their ponies. "I think it's a great idea to name Crystal's colt Voyager," Jeff said with a huge smile. "But I'm not sure I like 'Nellie' for the filly."

"I kinda like Diane," Simon said softly.

Tracy looked at Jeff then batted her eyes and gave a silent, over exaggerated sigh. Jeff laughed, "Yeah, I know. You only talk about her all the time! 'Diane's hair is so beautiful.. Do you think Diane'll go to the movies with me? Oh Diane...' " Jeff was off the fence and running with Simon hot on his heels, Tracy laughing at the both of them.

When he caught Jeff, he kindly informed his friend that Diane's dad was a well known trainer and that he's agreed to take Simon on as an Apprentice next summer and if she just _happened_ to be there... Jeff made a kissing face and the wrestling match began, the boys laughing all the while. Before it could get out of hand, Tracy spoke up.

"I have her name, boys. We'll call her 'Lady Di'." They stopped their 'fight' and looked at her, impressed.

"I like it," said Simon as he pulled Jeff up.

Jeff caught Tracy's eye and gave her a look that spoke volumes. "That's... that's perfect, guys. Lady Di she is."

A little later on, Jeff found Tracy on the porch swing staring at her Omni. She glanced up at him and grimaced, snapping the Omni closed. "Still Red."

"And at last glance, ours was still Green," Jeff sat down next to her. "This has got to be the weirdest thing ever. We can't leave a Green Zone, you're stuck in a Red Zone, and we are in the same place. What gives?"

Suddenly, her Omni started chiming, startling them both. Tracy flipped open the Omni, which was flashing red-green, red-green.

"What the-- what's happening?" Jeff asked anxiously. "Have you ever seen it do this before, Trace?"

"No, never. Something's either really right or really, really wrong."

Jeff took her Omni, "What would make it freak out like this? Maybe--"

"Dad? Dad no, please! _Dad_!" Simon's frantic shouting could be heard across the corral. Jeff and Tracy ran toward his desperate cries.

"Simon! What's wrong?" Jeff called as he ran towards him. Simon clutched the radio and continued as if he didn't hear him.

"Dad? Dad! Oh my God, Dad please answer me!" He looked up at them, fear radiating from every pore. "He was talking to me, he hollered at Uncle Matt, and then nothing."

She grabbed the radio and tried several frequencies before finally reaching Nick. "Nick, it's Tracy. What's going on?"

"The water's running a bit high... Matt knew... good spot... fish--" the radio crackled with static and Tracy tried to get a better signal. "...started jumpin'..." more static, "..slipped and fell in...got swept away..."

"We'll be right there Nick! Tracy out." She turned to the boys, "Simon, Get the dogs. Jeff, go get towels, blankets and the first aid kit. Hurry!"

* * *

_VHQ_

Voyager Jon Wilcox led his student into the Control Room and over to the Omnitron. He was from the 2003 era, in his late 30's with short blonde hair and a great smile. His trainee had been Plucked from 1944, was in her mid 20's with brunette hair which she kept fashioned in a neat upsweep favored in her era.

Today was individual one on one training for the Senior Voyager Class, and Vivian Olsen stood in awe, reading the display screens. "Look at all the green lights, Wilcox!" She stared at the Omnitron in admiration. "This is amazing! Everything is going just as it should, which is a good thing."

"So it would seem, my young Padewan, so it would seem."

"_Why_ do you keep calling me that?" Jon gave her _that_ smile and she glared back at him, "Oh! It's that stupid movie! Star... Star Warriors? Star... whatever it is, you're driving me crazy! Yes I'm a trainee and you're my advisor, but do you have to keep using those movie lines?"

Wilcox sighed as she once again launched into one of her famous tirades. "Jetty this and Yadda that and Forcing people hither and yon, I swear! I'm glad I never made it to the end of the 20th century to see all this silliness. 2003 sounds pretty strange to me. Gimme good 'ole 1944: Rosie the Riveter, Rations, and Uncle Sam. And I'm still not convinced I didn't die when I fell off that ladder at the ship yard. I must be stuck in some kind of purgatory where you have to go to school and --"

Jon was checking the Omnitron for disturbances when he suddenly held up his hand, silencing his student. " Texas. October 1997. Use the For..." she glared at him and he stopped short, "Sorry. What do you see, Viv?"

Vivian sighed and studied the read out carefully before answering. Wilcox watched her closely; He had decided not to tell her that this was her Final Exam.

"Well, there's three Voyagers in a Green Zone and they... wait, that can't be right. They are actually showing up as part of the History of 1997 for the people at that ranch? I thought Voyagers weren't supposed to..." She fiddled with knobs and buttons, entered some code into the computer, printed out her own sheet and talked herself through the report. "Hmm, Voyager Tracy Reynolds was sent on assignment to Texas, May 1996. According to the Assignment notes, Professor Garth turned it into a Long Term Assignment."

She paced around as she read, "Then Voyagers Phineas Bogg and Jeffrey Jones omni'ed in..." she pulled up a separate report, "three times from July to November 1996, and then January and April of 1997. Kinda like a 'home away from home', huh? Hope I can get one of those..." Wilcox smiled as she continued. "Then they landed again September 20th, 1997 right after their assignment with Princess... Wow, they got a dozy of an assignment there, didn't they Jon?"

He nodded sadly, remembering Diana's death and the media frenzy that followed. "That was a tragedy many, many of us wished we could change."

Vivian scanned the report, "But I still don't understand why they are a part of that history. Unless..."

Wilcox held his breath, beaming with pride as she compared the two printouts. She was on the right track, he could feel it.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

_Saturday, November 29th_

Tracy drove as fast as possible to the fishing site. Simon radioed the accident into the Sheriffs office, and was told Search and Rescue was on their way.

When they arrived, Kirk and Phineas were sitting at the edge of the river, soaked and shivering.

"Dad!"

"Bogg!"

They vaulted out of the truck, grabbed the blankets and ran over to them, followed by Bo and Katie.

Nick met Tracy at the truck looking very concerned. "We can't find Matt. Ray and Tom have been in the water for 15 minutes now trying to find him..." Tracy put her arm around him in support as he finally gave in to the tears.

The Search and Rescue team scoured the area while Simon and Jeff walked up and down the shore line with Bo and Katie. The dogs would sniff around, then run to the water and bark. Katie pawed at the water and looked at Simon, who sent her into the river for the fourth time looking for his uncle. No one was willing to give up until the Search Team Leader called it off because it was too dark to continue.

Kirk sat in front of the fire at the campsite wrapped in blankets, staring hard at the waters edge while Phineas was pacing the river angrily with a flashlight, refusing to give up his search or even take a towel or blanket to warm him. Tom and Ray were led over to Tracy and the others by Deputy Curry and told to get warmed up and dry off, officially ending their search efforts. After she got the three of them settled, Tracy finally forced Bogg to wrap up in something dry and sat him down beside the others just as the boys returned.

They headed straight for Kirk and Bogg, who looked up expectantly, hoping against hope they had any news. Bogg stood as Simon went to his dad, shook his head and collapsed into his arms, grief stricken. Phineas clasped his shoulder and gave it a squeeze. Kirk glanced up at him with a look that carried more anguish than any words could convey. Nick and the others bowed their heads, reality finally settling in. Jeff walked over to Phineas and into his embrace, the agony in his dark eyes speaking volumes.

The hardest thing for Bogg was when he stole a look at his Omni: it was Green. When Tracy walked over a few minutes later, she was holding her Omni and showed it to him and Jeff, fresh tears in her eyes. "_Now _it's Green?!? _How_ can it be Green?" she whispered as the three of them cried together.

* * *

_VHQ_

"Oh my goodness! That's it!" Viv danced around, waving the reports in the air. "The Council has decided to Pluck Matt Boyd! Voyager Reynolds was to learn about Matt and his family so she could be their Support when he was taken! Which means," she fiddled with a few more knobs and entered in code for a new print-out. She grabbed the new sheet, "which means Voyagers Bogg and Jones were also part of the Support Team!"

Jon Wilcox could not have been prouder. "Well done, young Jedi! Ow! It's not polite to hit your elders, young lady."

"Technically, I'm **your** elder, Mister."

"OK, I'm sorry for the Star Wars references, but it's a hard habit to break."

Vivian laughed, "OK then, Master Yadda--"

"Yo-da."

"Whatever."

"Say it right, you must. Only then will the right answer give you, yes. Pass your Final Exam you will..." Jon grinned at his student's shocked expression. "Can you tell me, Padewan Olsen, why there was a Support Team of 3 for this new Voyagers family?"

She regained her composure, smiled and placed her hands together in a praying position and bowed low, "I believe I can, oh great Master Jetty..."

Jon laughed, "Jed**-eye** Master!"

"Right, Jed-eye Master. It gives the family and friends of the new Voyager specific people to bond with: Bogg and Reynolds will be there for the brother and his men and will support each other in their own grief over Matt's 'death', and Jones will be there for Simon Boyd, just as he was for Princes William and Harry. It will also help Jones deal better with his own emotions about his parents death, and face his fears of losing those close to him. And for Voyager-in-training Matt Boyd, he will trust us more because he knows Bogg, Jones and Reynolds. He will feel more comfortable and be more willing to accept his new circumstances. Is that correct, Master Yo-_duh_?"

Jon took her hand and smiled, "Yes, my dear Padewan Viv. That is correct. Passed your Final Exam you did."

"I do have one question though..."

"Ask away."

"From the reports, it doesn't appear that our Voyagers knew... know? Gah!"

Jon laughed at her confusion. "I still do the same thing. What is your question?"

"They don't appear to know it's a Support mission. Wouldn't it show up in the Guidebook?"

Jon pondered his answer, "Well Viv, it's... complicated. We usually Pluck a trainee from a deadly situation. Like Matt Boyd, or even you; falling 14 feet off a ladder into scrap metal would have been instant death." She shuddered as he continued, "Can you imagine if your co-worker Ashleigh knew you would fall, even knowing you would be plucked? Her instinct would be-"

"To save me," she finished. "Wow, I hadn't thought of it that way. Wait...Ashleigh's a Voyager?"

Jon nodded, "She sure is. Great lady too, if I do say so myself. Best wife a man could ask for. As a matter of fact, she'll be out there with the Trainees right now. Come, we must greet our new arrivals."

"Thank you, oh Mighty Jed-eye Master Yo-duh," Viv giggled as he led her away. "But could you please do me a favor? Next time, pick something or someone from _my_ time line to identify with?"

"Next time, General Macarthur it will be, Rosie."

* * *

_November to Early December_

Matt's body was never found. Tracy, Phineas and Jeff did the best they could to help Kirk, Simon and the others through the next few days as they prepared for a memorial service. Friends and family from all over the state came in; even Simon's mom Debra showed up, surprising her family. She, Kirk and Tracy talked extensively during her stay, and things were looking good for the family once more.

Jeff disappeared after the service and Tracy suggested that Phineas let him be for a while. When he didn't show up for dinner, Phineas went looking for him. He found Jeff in the corral petting Lady Di. Jeff saw him approach and started yelling at him about how wrong things were, that it was Diana all over again, and that they should be allowed to go back and save Matt.

That was the last straw for Bogg, "Damnit Jeffrey, I tried to save him! Don't you think I tried? I was right there, and there wasn't anything I could do. I'd have given anything at that moment to use the Omni kid, anything! It all happened so fast... I was following him from rock to rock, then he lost his balance... I tried to grab him, but he was just out of my reach... Oh God Jeff! The look in his eyes before he went under..." His eyes showed the haunting memory of that day, and Phineas wept for the first time since the accident.

"I-I'm sorry, Bogg! I didn't mean to.. I didn't know..." He put his arm around him as he cried, awash with guilt as he tried to comfort his friend. "I'm really sorry, Bogg. I didn't mean for it to sound like I was blaming you." He was unable to fight the tears any longer. "Why do we have to go through this again?"

Phineas sat down next to the fence and tried to compose himself and Jeff sat next to him and sighed heavily. "I don't think I can take any more of this. First Diana, then me, and now Matt. How do you keep goin?" He rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hands, "And then I go spouting off again about how unfair it all is... you probably wanna hit me or something."

"The thought did cross my mind." Jeff had to smile through his own tears. Bogg seemed to have recovered enough to be sarcastic, which was a good sign.

"Things aren't always going to go the way you want them to Jeffrey. You've had a lot of rough spots in your life the past few years, but you weren't made a Voyager to go back and change them. To be a Voyager, you have to be willing to let History play itself out the way it's supposed to, even if you're dying inside. You have to make a decision, right now: either decide that being Voyager is the most important job in the world no matter how hard it gets, or keep whining and let me give your 5 year old attitude something to be upset about!"

As he was talking, Phineas had put his arm around Jeff's shoulders, and then pretended to strangle him with the threat of an 'attitude adjustment'. "OK, OK! I get it! Gah! No, Stop!"

Bo and Katie heard familiar laughter and headed to the corral and found Jeff and Phineas wrestling playfully. They barked excitedly and joined the fray, attacking arms and legs with abandon.

* * *

_Christmastime_

By mid December, Tracy had given the reins back to Kirk to run the ranch on his own. On Christmas Eve they had a little ceremony in the front yard, and officially named the ranch the KMS Boyd Ranch. Simon looked at his dad and smiled, "Uncle Matt would be proud."

"He sure would, son. He sure would."

Christmas Day was beautiful and everyone had a wonderful time together. There were tears of happy memories as gifts were given; Ray, Tom and Nick gave Kirk a sign for the ranch that they'd been working on with Matt, and Simon gave his dad a stuffed Jolly Green Giant and Sprout, which had 'pipsqueak' written on it's chest. Then they all listened to Kirk talk about past Christmases with his brother, and the others added their memories of Matt as well.

As a special surprise, Tracy had arranged for Debra Boyd to join them for dinner. The women had talked at length when Debra was there for the Memorial and Tracy learned that she herself had been part of the reason Debra had left. But once she hinted that there was a "Mysterious Benefactor" who was working through Tracy to help the family along and had no intention of ever breaking up the family, Debra had been able to see her as more of a friend and thanked her for taking care of her boys.

As things wound down that evening, Tracy went to her room and was surprised to find an envelope on her bed. **_To Tracy. Open Alone._** She opened it and took out the note.

_Miss Reynolds:  
"Congratulations on a job well done. Voyager Boyd speaks very highly of you and your fellow Voyagers Bogg and Jones."_

She gasped and re-read the first two lines again to be sure she hadn't misread anything. **_Voyager_**_ Boyd? Are they serious?_

_"As I'm sure you are now aware, the three of you were chosen to be on Voyager Boyd's Support Team. We apologize for the delay in getting you this information; however we feel that it was in the best interest of all concerned. You are all now able to leave at any time._

_Councilmember Walters."_

As if on cue, Phineas and Jeff came down the hall looking for her. She stepped out of her room and held out the note to Jeff. "What's this," he asked as he took it and started to read.

"You'd better sit down before you fall down," she said quietly. Phineas looked at her, confused. "Matt's been Plucked,"she whispered. "He's one of us now."

They sat on her bed and read the note over and over, overjoyed but reeling from the information. Tracy looked at the two of them, a sad smile on her face. "Do you realize that we've just been given our wings? I was so anxious to get out, but now that I can, I don't know that I want to go yet."

"I know what you mean," Phineas replied. "We've gone through so much here with them, and it feels like home."

Jeff looked at the note again and sighed. "It was hard enough trying to leave the first time...What are we gonna do, Bogg?"

"You tell me," he said with a glint in his eye. "You want to be treated like an adult, so you decide."

"Ha, ha, very funny."

"I'm serious. Tell me what we should do."

Tracy bit her lip to keep quiet. Jeff sighed and rolled off the bed and walked around the room. "Well, I'd kinda like to stay for New Year's Eve... we could say you've been re-assigned and we need to leave January 2nd. Do ya think we can manage that?"

Phineas nodded then turned to Tracy. "And what about you Tracy? What are you going to tell them?"

She thought a moment before answering. "Well, Kirk has pretty much taken things over from me. I've been telling him for a few weeks now that I was planning on leaving soon, just in case my Omni finally let me outta here. I guess I could tell him I'll stay one more week as well."

"Well, then, I guess it's decided. We stay through New Years and then head out." Phineas looked at the two of them and smiled. "This has been, by far, the strangest 'assignment' we've ever been on. But I wouldn't want to have done it with anyone else."

"Gee thanks," Tracy said as she smacked him with a pillow. His look of shocked indignation was all Jeff needed to pelt him with the other bed pillow. In no time at all, it became a free for all, involving everyone in the house.

_Friday, January 2nd, 1998_

One week later, Tracy was out front for the last time, saying goodbye. Try as they might, no one could keep from crying. If she thought watching Phineas and Jeff leave was hard, that was a piece of cake compared to this. She hugged each of them and encouraged them to keep things running as smoothly as she had, and gave them each a little gift. Debra had come to say goodbye as well, and thanked Tracy once more for bringing her family closer together. "I'm sorry for thinking the worst of you and not trusting my husband; please forgive me. And I truly appreciate all your "boss" has done to keep this ranch in our family. Please thank him for me as well."

Tracy smiled and assured her she would and the Boyd family walked her to the cab. She kissed Simon on the cheek, "You behave yourself, Simon, and remember to talk to your dad, or any of the other guys if you need anything, OK? If I have to come back and clean you up again..."

"I swear Miss Tracy! I'll never do that again, ever! I can't be a horse trainer if I'm on drugs, can I?"

Debra smiled and held him close, "That's my boy."

Tracy sighed, "If I ever have a son, I hope he's as smart and good-looking as you." Then she turned to Kirk, "You are an amazing man, Kirk Boyd. I know you'll make this ranch your own, and even better than you ever dreamed it could be. And remember what I said about your little brother."

He gave her hand a quick squeeze and looked over to the memorial stone at the base of the porch and smiled. "That little pipsqueak will keep me in line, I know it. I can feel him here now..." Tracy gave him a hug and he stepped back and took his wife by the hand.

Simon laughed, "Gee, this looks like the end of The Wizard of Oz, except the balloon is a big yellow cab!" The all laughed as Tracy got in and drove away.

* * *

After the cab dropped her off in town, she went down an alley and hit her Omni. She landed in the garden area at VHQ and recognized an old friend. "Wilcox!"

Jon turned around and caught Tracy in a hug as she ran to him. "Well look who's back! How's my favorite student?" He stepped back and smiled at her. "Looks like you paid attention in class; great job back there. By the way, there's someone here I want you to meet. Voyager Reynolds, this is Voyager Vivian Olsen. You were her Final Exam."

The women laughed as they shook hands. Tracy whispered to Viv, "Did he do it to you too? Were you his 'Padewan'?"

Vivian laughed harder, "So it wasn't just me? Wow, what a relief!" Jon cleared his throat and Viv looked at him, then remembered, "Oh, Tracy, I almost forgot! There's someone else we'd like you to meet..."

Before she knew it Tracy was enveloped in a bear hug, being spun in circles. "Welcome back, Voyager Reynolds," a familiar voice whispered in her ear.

Tracy gasped, recognizing who it was instantly. Through tears of joy she managed to say, "Good to see you again, Voyager Boyd."

THE END!


	17. Chapter 17

**A word from the author:**

Here are my notes to you, my wonderful readers. Edit/explanation notes are first, then the original thanks follow.

**August 2007**

To my wonderful readers:

I decided to "just read" my story and guess what? Out came the Editing Pen of Death! LOL Three paragraphs in I was re-typing like a mad woman. So I followed my heart and I do believe I've made a wonderful story even **_better. _**Some chapters went through minor adjustments, others more major (with some new content even!), and it's just amazing how much fuller and richer this story has become.

I'm about half way through edits as I write this, and I do note what chapters are currently re-posted, just to keep you updated. So far Chapters 1-9 have gone through some type of edit, so I hope you enjoy this 'new and improved' story.

Dayna

_**8/22/07**_

Now re-posted chapters 10-12. Thanks for re-reading and commenting.

**_9/1/07_**

Edits are DONE! Yippee! LOL I have finally created the story I set out to write, and I'm overjoyed at how well it's turned out. I definitely fleshed some things out and thinned others, and it was well worth it. I do hope you all enjoy it more the 2nd time around. For previous readers: you'll see that I split and modified the VHQ scene and I think it works much better. And one thing I tried to flesh out more was Mrs. Debra Boyd, Kirk's wife. It was difficult to fit her into the story without having the Boyd Marital problems run off with the story, and that's not what I wanted. I hope I gave enough insight to be believable.

So this is it. I have actually read through the entire thing without the Editing Pen of Death marking up my pages, and I'm beyond pleased. Thank you one and all once again for re-reading, or reading for the first time. It's been my joy and pleasure bringing this story to you.

God Bless,

Dayna

* * *

**_September 2005_**

I can't believe how much joy (and heartache, and frustration) this story has brought me. I'm positively euphoric over it's completion- not because it's "finally done", but because I'm proud of myself and the story I've written. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought my "silly little plot bunny" would become such and epic journey for me as a writer or for the characters I have grown to love.

Once again, I must drag my husband Don into the spotlight. His continuing and unwavering support has been part of the driving force to complete this story. His input has been invaluable and I could not have gotten this thing done right without his help and ideas. He's beta'd the story during Angel games (OK, I'd read it to him with the game on mute) and still give me ideas and correct grammar problems or physical plot problems, and not lose a second of the game. :;:giggles:;: Even when he _didn't _want to listen, he knew how important it was to me and did it anyway. Of course, his revenge is reading me all the good parts of the many series of books he reads, so I guess we're even... sorta. ;) Thank you Don, from the bottom of my heart. Your support and love mean the world to me. :;:wipes tears away so she can continue:;:

To Jay, my very own PhineasBg, thank you again for encouraging me to write in the first place. All 3 of my stories started from daydreams (which I now know are plot bunnies), and when I shared them with you, you told me I had to write them out... especially the bunny that turned into Crossroads. You're a great writer yourself and a wonderful friend, and I'm glad I listened to you.

To all the readers: Thank you all for joining me for this amazing ride. I've made some wonderful new friends because of this story, and I'm so glad we could share it together. Your reviews mean so much to me and I thank you for finding and reading my stuff. I hope to find another plot bunny soon, seeing as I've been told by hubby (and others) that I need to keep writing. :blushes: Any suggestions? And just so you know, I will be making minor continuity edits to various chapters in the future, so if you get an update about the story, know that it's really not anything new, just corrected.

I hope you all enjoyed playing in my sandbox with me; it's been great fun! Thank you again. I mean it. You guys rock!

Dayna


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